060: How to turn your good to great with Shelsey Jarvis - Betsy Pake

060: How to turn your good to great with Shelsey Jarvis

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PODCAST

Shelsey is an online business mindset coach, helping woo-curious female entrepreneurs create a business that balances spirituality and down-to-earth practicality. She has been an entrepreneur in many shapes and forms since 2007.

Find her website here:  www.leftbrainedhippie.com

Transcript:

Hi, I’m Betsy Pake. I’m a reinvention strategist and NLP coach, author and speaker. But really, I feel like I just work with people all over the country to help them be happier. And to help them have a little bit more ease in their life. Today, I hope to do the same for you. Thanks for listening. Now let’s go live. Hey, everybody, welcome to the show. I am excited today to have my friend Chelsea Jarvis with us. Hey, Chelsea.

Hi, how are you?

I’m so good. Thanks for coming on my show today.

Thank you so much for having me. So tell everybody a little bit about

you and what you do.

Okay, so I am an online business mindset coach. So I help. I call them Wu curious female entrepreneurs, because they’re the, they’re the women who are kind of hard workers and really want to get their online businesses up and running. And they’ve heard of this, like, alignment and law of attraction and stuff, but they don’t really know how to apply it. So I help them apply it so that they actually get their businesses up and running with more ease and without having to bust their butt was working way too many hours and having it take way longer than it needs to.

Yeah, I love that. And, you know, I think that if someone’s listening, and they’re not an online entrepreneur, they don’t have a business, this information can help anybody with whatever they’re trying to do, right? Because I totally, I really like the whole alignment before action thing. So tell everybody a little bit about that. Like what? Like, what does that mean, when you say,

yeah, we should probably start there to explain what alignment is because a lot of people, it’s very fuzzy term, unless you’re already in that word in that world, I mean, so alignment, permit me to get a little bit spiritual for a minute. And basically, at the most basic level, we are human being or sorry, we are spiritual beings having a human experience. And alignment simply means that your human self is on the same page as your spiritual self, it means that you are a you are in that state of mind where you’re able to clearly receive intuitive hits, you’re able to receive information from your, your source energy, or your God or your spirit, or whatever you want to call it, it’s all essentially the same thing. And what that looks like in real life is just being in a really good mood. That’s what a line, that’s what alignment feels like is when you’re just like over the moon happy about whatever it is. You’re in alignment. Yeah. And you can tell your state of alignment based on your emotion. That could be an entire other podcast. So I won’t like go into it. But basically, you can tell your state of alignment based on your mood. If you’re in a really good mood, you’re in alignment. If you’re in a terrible mood, you’re way out of alignment.

Yeah. And I think that that our emotions are such a good guideposts to know what’s going on with us internally. So I even have a little alarm on my phone, where every hour, it’s just a little bell, I go skiing. And then I can ask myself, like, oh, how do I feel? Am I feeling good? I’m feeling bad. And then if I’m feeling bad, I can I know that that’s like an alarm that something is in congruent, right. So I’m an NLP person. So I use the word in congruence.

Right? So buddy, NLP, so

yeah, okay. Yeah. So when my actions, the things that I’m doing aren’t aligning with my values, and my beliefs and all those things that makes you feel like you’re not in the flow, right, which is the same thing, like you’re not aligned. And so I really like this because I know for myself, I found I was starting to work a lot like Work, work, work, work, work. And you know, that song were like, that was me. I was all about it. And I mean, I would work and then I would, my husband would come home, I’d make dinner, and then I’d be like I have more work to do. And part of it was because I liked my work. But part of that was because I didn’t know what was working, right. Like I have to do everything. And one day, like literally only like three weeks ago, I said, I’m just gonna not do anything until I feel like a hit. I call it like a hit. But it’s almost like a intuition or like a little voice in my head that says you should do that. And, and when I got that, and I did it that made much more of an impact on my business than the work, work, work, work, work, you know, so totally having that moment. So tell people a little bit more about how they can get back in alignment if they find they’re feeling bad and not in Yeah, in the flow.

I think it starts really with knowing when you’re out of alignment. So you have to recognize the signs, but I want to just back up because one thing that you said was that you loved your you loved your work and that was why you were working so much and I think that’s a bit of a lie that we tell ourselves. Like, I’m not saying that you didn’t love your work. But I think that’s kind of some something that we tell ourselves to justify why we’re working so much when in reality, most of the time, it’s because we’re afraid of what will happen if we stop. And I have a lot of personal experience with this. When I had my second child a couple years ago, I was still in that hustle mode. And I, okay, the day that I went into labor with with my daughter, I had three calls, booked three consultations. And then I went into labor and had to cancel all of them. And I was panicked. Because I was like, Oh, my God, I’m not gonna get those clients now. So yeah, you know, two days after my daughter was born, I was trying to reschedule those consultations. I’m like, hustle, hustle, hustle. And, you know, my husband, of course, thought I was out of my mind. But I was like, Oh, it’s just because I love my job. And

I’m really thinking, how do you say that? Is there truth to that for me? And I feel like, it doesn’t mean I don’t like my work. But the reason I was doing it so much was because I was afraid. Yeah, you’re totally right. Yeah.

Yeah. No, it was I guess I get that a lot. Yeah. I’m joking. Yeah. Um, my, yeah, like, my husband probably saw it more clearly than I did, because he was on the outside. But I was just telling myself that I was working because I’ve had such passion for my business. When in reality, I was just like, I was afraid to I was definitely afraid of losing the momentum. I was afraid to take some time off to enjoy my newborn child. Like, it got bordering on insane. And I mean, none of those clients booked with me because I probably was, I was probably like spouting desperation, no doubt. And like, and it lasted for several more months after that, where I was just like, hustle, hustle, hustle. And one day I woke up and realize that my daughter was six months old, and I felt like I barely knew her like I would. Yeah, I like I’ve been holding her while I was working. But like, I hold her with one hand and nurser and work with the other hand, like I was never fully present, right? And yeah, that just kind of hit me. I was like, Oh, my God, I feel like I missed out on the first six months of my daughter’s life. Yeah, because I was so much in hustle mode, and I just completely lost sight of what was important.

Yeah, you know, it’s funny, because just this morning, I have a Facebook group. And in that group, I posted like, our top three priorities. And one of mine or two of mine right now are one is I don’t turn on my phone. Like, take it off airplane mode. until after I’ve dropped my daughter off at school. She’s in high school. But if I turn it on, I’m, I’ve dived in, I’m an email, I’m kind of dressed, I’m looking, you know. And when my husband comes home, even though he likes to come home, and like change out of his suit, and all that when he gets home, I stand up from my computer, and walk over to him and say hello and greet him, you know, so like, being mindful and being present in that moment, can be a hard thing to remember to do. So I totally get that. Like, yeah, exactly.

We take it for granted. And we’re just like, we have in our minds, like, oh, if I can just work a little harder. If I just put in more hours, then you know, at some point, it’s gonna come together, but that’s not like that’s so we

know, like, we hear that, like the hustle, get on the train or whatever, you

know, like, yeah, I’m the anti hustle.

Okay, so yes, let’s talk about that then. Because, you know, and I’m a, I go back and forth between being a Gary Vaynerchuk fan and a non fan. I’m actually more of a non fan than I am a fan. But I saw him speak live. And I did like what he said, but I’ve never liked his never ending hustle. Hmm. So

yeah, like,

talk about that, because that is like, ingrained in our society that we have to it’s a badge of honor to work hours and all of those things, but does that really help us? No,

it doesn’t. You know, when I started making a lot more money in my business, when I cut my hours down to about 20 hours a week.

Yeah, when I started making anyone I turned Friday into fun friday where I was, and I do anything I want. Yeah,

yeah. And it’s not. Okay. So, disclaimer here. It’s not just about cutting the hours. I mean, yes, there are studies that have been done that prove that your productivity goes down after I think 36 hours a week. But that’s not what I’m talking about. Here. I’m really talking about focusing on the activities that absolutely matter. And ignoring the ones that don’t or delegating the ones that don’t usually you don’t usually they don’t have to be done at all. But most of the time are spending more time in most of the people are spending more time in Canva creating the perfect so

that they are selling.

Yeah.

So that’s an example of like creating extra work for yourself so that you can tell yourself at the end The day that you worked hard and yeah, and it is good money.

And I think that’s true. Like when I decided on fun Friday, and that’s where I’ll usually go like a meet a friend for coffee. That’s the day I go to friend meet a friend for lunch, I go get a manicure pedicure. You know, like, that’s my day to do whatever. Sometimes I do some work. Like if it’s something creative that I feel like doing. If you’re inspired, right? If I’m inspired when I took that day away, it made the other days more important. So I didn’t want to waste it on like creating a new cover photo for face. Yeah, yeah. Where before I was just like churning all of this stuff. That didn’t really matter.

Yeah. And I mean, it’s not that your business wouldn’t be enhanced at all by having that stuff done. It’s just that when you decide, okay, yeah, let me say this first, when you decide to really focus on what matters, you see the needle move a lot faster. But the other thing that just came to mind was a lot of people have this illusion that, you know, when they’re earning six figures, or whatever arbitrary number they have in mind, yeah, that the workload will suddenly like dissipate, it’ll just go away. And all of a sudden, they’ll have all this free time. And it’s just total BS. That’s not how it works. Because by the time they get to that point, they either are too afraid to give up the control and delegate what needs to be delegated. Or they just find themselves under this massive snowball of all of these plates that they’re trying to juggle in the air. And they, they just don’t know how to hold it all up. And so they’re trying to compensate for that lack of alignment with extra work.

Do you think that somebody can use that whole, like, listening for the intention and getting in alignment if they work for somebody else like, or is that Oh, yeah, I’m here to talk about how that would work. You know what that would look? Oh, yeah.

Okay, so let me give an example. Because I’ve, I quit my nine to five job, about a year a little more than a year ago, so July 2016. And even before then, I was on maternity leave for a year. So I haven’t actually worked in my nine to five since March 2015. And by this point, I was I had been studying mindset and spirituality and trying to apply it the best I could within the tight confines of my job. And I realized that you know what, like, it didn’t necessarily change the way my job operated. Because at my job, it was a very closed minded job. They weren’t open to new ideas at the very old fashion company. And they just really don’t didn’t want to veer from their way of doing things. But what it did for me, was it, I was able to make more sales, I was able to attract more customers. I was I had ideas, I was able to say the right thing that the customers needed to hear in order to make a decision, I was able to basically make myself happy in a place that where everyone else was miserable. Yeah, yeah. And you know, it, guess what, like customers would come in. And if I wasn’t working, they didn’t want to know they would walk right back out again.

Yeah, you know, one thing. And even if you this is all like new to you. Sometimes, you know, you’ll have a gut feeling about somebody like you’ll walk up, you’re like, I don’t know, if something just wasn’t right. Like you go to buy a car, right? That happens a lot where you’re like, I don’t know, just something about the salesperson fell off. Well, yeah, what you’re really sensing is that they’re in congruent, right, the way they’re acting isn’t really what they’re saying. And we pick up on a ton of cues that people use with their body language and their facial expressions, their tone, the words, they’re choosing all of their frequency. Yeah, their frequency word. We notice that unconsciously. And so when someone is able to be congruent, they’re able to be aligned, then it feels better to us, right? We go, Oh, this feels really good. And so then you are able to attract whatever it is that you need, whether you’re selling something or negotiating a contract, or just getting along with coworkers, right?

Yeah, well, there’s a really great expression. You can’t make a wrong turn when you’re in alignment. And you can’t make a right one when you’re not,

huh, yeah, like that. Yeah. Yeah. So true.

Yeah, you literally cannot steer yourself wrong. It’s impossible to make a wrong term when you’re operating from a state of alignment. And just as a reminder of being in alignment means you’re in a happy mood, you’re appreciating what’s going on around you. Even if it’s, you know, not your ideal situation. Because I know some of you might be sitting there saying, Yeah, but Chelsea, like I don’t have money, I can’t pay bills, or I have this job I hate or my family is like, you know, not acting the way that I want them to, or my husband or wife is bugging me or Yeah, but you can still get into alignment. And in fact, a lot of those problems, you’ll find they actually go away pretty quickly. Yeah, yeah. When you’re operating from a state of alignment because you inspire others around you. I notice a drastic difference in my kids behavior when I’m in a good mood. mood and, you know, really operating from that place of just patience and love and compassion and understanding. Whereas when I veer into, you know, mean mommy mode. It happens like I’m not perfect, right? And, like, they push against me and they rebel. They don’t listen. And that’s no coincidence. And I’m, like, a lot of parents to say, Well, I get in a bad mood because they’re not listening. No, no, no. Yeah, don’t Yeah. Don’t put that on your kids. Yeah,

yes. Well, that’s the taking responsibility for yourself. And most people can’t do that. They really struggle, buddy.

Nobody can vibrate for you.

Right? Yes. Right, exactly. We’ll talk about so that that seems like a good sort of transition into the law of attraction. Because, because that really gets into like, how we’re how we’re vibrating. What we’re giving off is actually bringing more to us, right?

Yes. Okay, so this is, this is going to trigger some people because some people don’t, aren’t ready to take responsibility for, you know, what’s attracted. And so, when I say this, I’m in no way meaning that your this is not victim blaming, you know, when it comes to bad things happen to you or anything, but the law of attraction operates like this, and I’ll just do a very Crash Course explanation. The law of attraction means that we are all vibrational beings at our most basic level, we’re all just molecules that are vibrating,

and then everything is even everything. Yeah, not at all. Like,

yeah, everything like inanimate objects, animals, people, like everything you’re looking at, around you, whether you can touch it, or, you know, knock on it, or push on it. It’s all just vibration, they’re vibrating molecule molecules. But yeah, and so things that are the same vibration are attracted together. So that means, you know, people who are operating on the same vibration they are attracted to, to one another. And similarly, somebody who has a propensity to blame will be attracted to somebody who has a propensity for guilt, like those two experiences will be attracted together, because the person who tends to blame everybody for their problems, will find somebody to blame. And the somebody who, you know, has a tendency toward guilt will find more reasons to be guilty. Right? And, likewise, it can work in such a positive way, too. So I mean, if you are in such a fabulous mood, and you’re just in massive appreciation of everything around you, and you’re like, Oh, my God, what a beautiful day outside. Look at those trees. You know, it’s it’s autumn, as we’re recording this, and the trees are turning color up here. I’m in Canada. So you know, just looking around and be like, wow, it’s such an amazing day. And oh, wow, like, look how adorable my kid looks riding his bike, just finding things to appreciate. The more you do that, the more you find to appreciate. And yeah, you know, so just as I got into kind of a wonky vibration over the summer, and very complacent and not really knowing what to do with myself, then the last few weeks, I’ve been making a much better effort to not be lazy with my vibration, and to be very intentional about it. And it’s totally paying off like just amazing opportunities coming out of nowhere, like just clients coming out of nowhere referrals like.

And I think sometimes when you get in a wonky state like that, so if someone’s listening, and you’re like, I just always feel kind of bull. Well, yes, the path of least resistance, your vibration is going to stay wherever is the least resistance. And so yeah, you might have to do some work to get to a higher vibration. But once you get good at that, that will become the path of least resistance, so that you have control over this.

There’s a lot of momentum, like if you if you’re, if you’re saying to yourself, like oh, I just always feel like I’m in a funk, there’s a lot of momentum because there’s that’s another thing to note about the law of attraction is it functions on momentum. So if you’ve got a lot of momentum, and then you’ve been feeling like you’re in a funk for months, or maybe even years, then you’ve got a lot of momentum, it’s like, think of a ball rolling down a hill or a car rolling down a hill, like, you know, the the more it goes down the hill, the faster it’s going to go and the more powerful it’s going to be. And you know, for cars rolling down a hill and you don’t want to be at the bottom of it. But that that’s that momentum works in positive ways and negative ways. And so I have the logical next question that I’m thinking people are going to be asking is, okay, well, if I’ve got all of this negative momentum, how do I stop it or how do I turn it around? And it the best place to start is when you wake up in the mall, That’s why morning routines are so key. And that’s just, it’s no coincidence that the most successful people in the world, like make their morning routine a priority. And it’s because they’re taking advantage of the fact that your momentum slows down when you sleep, or it stops. Actually, yeah, and you’ve got a fresh start every single morning. But what a lot of us do is we tend to wake up and remember all of the crap that we were thinking about yesterday.

Yeah, you know, a lot of my clients, because how you wake up is typically how you go to sleep. And so I tell them to run through their whole day, not as it actually happened. But as if everything worked out perfectly, like just run your day, make it perfect, because then your brain is thinking that stuff. And when you wake up, you’re like, everything is perfect, right? You’re not thinking about the crap. You’re thinking about how good that feels. And you might not even, like acknowledge that’s what you’re thinking, but you’ll feel better. Right? So yeah, I really like that. And I do that myself. And then sometimes I’m like, how did Did that really happen? badly? Because I just remember it really working out.

Yeah, yeah, it’s all about perspective. Because I mean, if you look at any, if you look at any room, for example, there are aspects that you love about it and aspects that you don’t love so much. Like, you know, there any situation, any room, any person, there’s always aspects that are good, and aspects that are that, you know, that are not to your liking. I don’t want to say bad, but just not to your liking. And it’s all in what you focus on. If you’re one of those people who focuses on the negative aspects of everything. I mean, who wants to be around those people? First of all, right? Yeah, it’s just it’s not pleasant to listen to people complain all the time. But

almost time they don’t even know. That’s what they’re doing right now. You’re listening, and you’re like, Oh, my gosh, I don’t even think they’re aware that every word coming out of their head, my husband and I do a thing. It’s an Andy Dooley thing. I don’t know if you’re familiar with the Dooley. No, um, but Andy do, it’s a stop, cancel clear, get the fear out of here. And if I notice, my husband is saying like, this didn’t work and this button fell off. And this, I’ll say, Stop, cancel clear, get the fear out of here. And he’ll do the same thing to me. And it’s so nice to have somebody to disrupt that pattern when they notice it, because you may not have. So yeah, if you can get your family on board, like my daughter is totally on board. You know, if we’re in a bad mood, I’ll say like, we got to have a dance party, and we’ll turn on really great music and just jump around. Because you can’t stay. You can’t stay sad. You can’t. or angry. Yeah,

yeah. And NLP speak that’s using your physiology to change your state. Yes, yes. And, you know, that’s actually a really great way to kind of break negative momentum in a day, because like I said, it happens when you go to sleep. But what if you’re at work, or what if you’re in a situation where you can’t just go take a nap, a really short and quick exercise that you could do, just like lock yourself in the bathroom for two minutes. And just close your eyes and take a few deep breaths. And just focus on a word that you want to feel my go to is the word satisfaction. Because for me, like, when I manifest something that I really love, or like when something good is happening in my life, I just feel this immense satisfaction. And I want more of that. So I kind of close my eyes, and I just focus on the word satisfaction. And I just allow myself to feel that word. I’m not trying to think of any specific incidents or anything that I want. You know, a lot of people try to focus on the things that they want, but it actually ends up making them feel worse a lot of the time. So this is a really great exercise, if that’s the case. But just focusing while you breathe deeply, focus on that word, and just feel that word. And do that for a minute or two, and you’re going to just feel your vibration, you’re going to feel your mood change, you’re going to feel your state change. And you can even smile, which is again, using your physiology to help change your state. And just really feel it with without needing to visualize a specific thing. And you’re probably going to find that specific thoughts start to come to mind when you do it, you’re probably going to start thinking about happy memories that felt satisfying, you’re probably going to start to think of specific things, but you don’t you won’t have to force it. It’s going to feel very natural.

Yeah, yeah, I like that. That’s a good. That’s a good tip. I know. Like for me, usually I’ll just start thinking of all the things I appreciate. And that really helps shift me you know, so it doesn’t even take very long. I mean, you know, Abraham says 17 seconds, right?

Well, that works. If you’re like already in it. If you’re in a place where you’re kind of bored or feeling better, then it could work. But if you’re downright angry, or if you’re ready to blame the world, there’s it’s going to be really tough to find something to appreciate because you’re just not in a space where you can even feel that you’re just mad at The world. And so trying to find stuff to appreciate it what, a lot of the time it won’t even feel genuine. So yeah, so people could have a hard time with that I that really works for me. But it may be that I never get too far or too far away from,

you know, from neutral or whatever. But

yeah, for somebody who’s in a state of total depression, trying to find stuff to appreciate, it’s not going to come easily to them, it’s going to be very difficult, because it’s going to feel forced and fake and corny. Whereas if they just do this and just focus on a word, then you know, maybe they’re not going to get all the way up to the, you know, into alignment just with this two minute trick, but they’ll feel better, they’ll feel a sense of relief,

right? Yeah. Yeah, I like that. So okay, one number cut. We’re running low on time. And I don’t want to keep you too long. But I could have, I could talk to you for several more hours. Just in case, somebody’s thinking like, Well, what about that bad thing that happened? Did I bring that to me?

Oh, yes, good question. Okay. So here’s the thing, we tend to make meaning of a lot of situations that really has no business being there. When you know, when something happens to us, like, let’s just use an example that I’m sure most people could relate to. Let’s say you text one of your friends. And you know, you ask them if they want to meet up on Friday night and have a drink or coffee or whatever. And you see that they read the text, but then they didn’t answer. What’s your go to reaction? Well, for somebody who’s operating from a place of alignment, then they’re probably going to just brush it off and be like, Oh, I guess they you know, they got distracted. I

was thinking that they’re driving. That’s what I thought.

Yeah, they’re driving or they just can’t answer right now. But somebody who is vibrating from a place of fear or blame or anger or resentment, they’re going to be just like, I don’t know if I can swear here. But yeah,

that bitch, right,

yes. Yeah, you don’t have to not answer me like, or like, it could be something like I did something wrong. I’m bugging her. Or, you know, having that negative reaction and making it mean something that you didn’t want that you that, you know that you that’s

had no business, that means. So okay, I really love that. I have another example if I can share that. Sure. Like, when my husband’s late to come home from work. I used to go like, in my head, I think, like, dang it, like, I’m making dinner, he knows dinner, he doesn’t respect my time, he doesn’t care about dinner. And so when he would come home, I would be like, I would treat him like crap, because I was annoyed because of all those things. I thought that were true. But when I treated him like crap, then he was annoyed and mad. And then it manifested itself into exactly what I thought. But when I shifted, and I thought he’s working really hard, and he’s working extra hours to make money for our family, like how thankful I am to have a husband that works so hard, so I can build my business. And then when he came home, I was so grateful to see him. And then he was so nice to me. It totally shifted and I manifested, right, I brought to me exactly what I thought in both cases.

Exactly. Yeah. And let’s take another example, you know, of something that’s, you know, that could be more difficult to swallow like getting fired, for example. Yeah. And you’re like, I didn’t attract that. And, you know, I wasn’t, you know, I wasn’t thinking about getting fired, like, or anything like that. So how could I possibly have attracted it? And here’s the thing, getting fired. For some people, they’re going to take it as an absolute disaster, they’re going to think like, this is the end of the world, like, we’re gonna be homeless and or some other people might be like, Oh, my God, if everything if it’s true that everything is working out in my favor, and that, you know, everything happens for a reason, then maybe the perfect job. Like maybe there’s another job that you wouldn’t have taken unless you would got fired.

Yes. Yeah. Cuz you would have seen? Yes, yeah. So here’s one that I’ve toyed with over the past like three years, probably I did not always feel like this. But I truly feel like this now. And I’m going to trigger a bunch of people.

Get ready,

get ready, hang on. So my mom died in a car accident when I was in high school. I absolutely believe that I was on the vibration where that could happen. Now, I also don’t believe that her transitioning was I don’t know how to say it in the right way. But I don’t see that in the same way as I used to. I used to see it as a tragedy and this terrible thing. I don’t see it like that now really, at all. Yeah. I actually see the value of it. And I, I actually believe that. That she’s just transitioned. She’s just not in physical form. Like there. is nothing different in our relationship now. But I believe that I was on the vibration where that could happen. And she was too and my sister was like, for whatever it wasn’t. And here’s how I describe that to people is that, you know, if little kids will drop stuff, and it’ll fall to the ground and break, and they didn’t mean to break it, they just didn’t understand that gravity existed.

So they have such a perfect analogy. Yes,

they experienced this the law of gravity. And I experienced the law of attraction. Just because I didn’t understand it doesn’t mean it didn’t exist. And there may not have even been anything I could have done to change my vibration. But for whatever reason, that was in our vibration, that event happened. And then what I did later, what my mindset was about it later, I could choose to go down a

tube

of horrible depression about it, or I could choose to see it differently, right. So in many ways, how I have come to see that is that that was my gift right now in my life is that I am able to show people a totally different way, when I’m talking to people, I can totally shift their perspective, because my perspective has shifted. And I wouldn’t have gotten to that space where I could help tons of people, if I hadn’t experienced that and had to experience the most extreme kind of shift.

Right. Everything was working out in your favor, baby.

Yes. Is that has anybody? Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, exactly. And I know that we wanted to talk about, like, creating space, or letting go of good to create space for great. Yeah. And, you know, so that the law of attraction, you know, it’s related to this as well, and getting getting in touch with your intuition. And so when Betsy invited me on this interview, it was that was supposed to be the topic. So I know.

A little over, yes. All right.

But yeah, okay, so let this concept of letting go of good to make space for great because a lot of people are so tightly clinging to their current circumstances, just for the simple fact that we’re scared of the unknown. We don’t know. Like, if you don’t have your current job, then what happens like if you don’t have your current relationship, and what happens leaves all of these questions and unknowns. And I mean, the purpose of our life is not to stay static in one place, we’re supposed to evolve and create and experience things. And when you’re holding so tightly on to your current situation. So for example, a job is a really good example. You’re not creating, you’re not creating the space in your life to accept something better. So if you’re, you know, if you’ve been in a job you hate for the last five years, and you’re like, Oh, yeah, like I’ll, you know, I’ll just get a better job eventually. But you need to create the vacuum for it. Because, like my husband, he’s been in a job he hates for five years. And so I’m trying to gently coax him into this idea. Yeah, of letting go of it. Because when you let go of something that was good, you’re able to accept something in your life, that’s so much better. And the perfect example, in my own life of this was last year, I was doing virtual assistant work. So copywriting setting up, you know, email sequences and stuff like that for for other entrepreneurs, while I got my own business off the ground. And I, I was working about 20 hours a week. And then I had this idea in my head, like, I really love to cut down my hours to 10 hours a week. And one of my clients said, like, I’m really sorry, but I have to, I have to fire you because I don’t have the money right now. Right to pay you. I said, Okay, no problem. Problem solved. There’s one client that was like, okay, that’s down to 15 hours. Perfect. Yeah. Now, just ask my other clients if I can only work 10 instead of 15. And we’ll be good. And that was fine. So that worked while I was building my business, getting more clients. And in the month of October last year, it was getting close to the end of the month, maybe the 25th 26th of October, something like that. And I was meditating because I was still thousands of dollars away from my pretty hefty goal for the month. And I asked, I just asked my, my intuition, like, Okay, what do I need to do? To meet my goal? What do I need to do to reach my goal? And I just meditated and listened and waited. And the answer that I received back was quit your VA gig all together. And I’m like, man,

Yeah, I know. I hate it when I hear stuff. And I’m like, No, no, no.

Yeah, I know it was. So it’s so scary because that was my last source of steady predictable income. Other than that, it was just clients. Yeah, you know, I, which, you know, I was I had a few of them at the time. But once those client contracts ended like then what? And so there was still so much unknown. But I decided to listen to my intuition. I didn’t even talk to my husband or anything. I just I sent an email to my client. And I said, Look, I’m really sorry, but I’ve got this intuitive hunch. And I need to, I’m giving you my two weeks notice. And in the days that followed, so by the end of the month, I had three new one on one clients, including my VA client. Yes, right. Turn into one of my mindset clients.

Isn’t that funny? Oh, my God. Nice. I so believe that that that is so true. That works. So how does somebody really make that shift then? Is it like they really have to be quiet enough to listen to their intuition? Don’t you think you can’t just you have to randomly drop stuff.

Okay, so let’s, let’s let’s bring this then. And time

vacuum. Talk about how universal playback Yeah,

yeah. Okay. So starting with the heart, going back to the hard work thing? What was the last time you had like a super inspired idea? Was it while you were toiling away over your computer? Or while was it while you were in the shower? Or taking a walk? Or not even thinking about anything in particular?

Yeah, I had one this morning, I was driving.

Yes, driving is a really, really good one. Yeah. Because you’re just kind of on autopilot in a way, and you’re just kind of enjoying the scenery or whatever you’re not, you’re not super focused on anything in particular. So that’s a really great space for the intuition to come through those intuitive ideas. And when you’re working, working, working, working 80 hours a week, you’re leaving a lot less space for those intuitive ideas to come in. So you have

Yeah, yeah. Okay. Yeah, sorry, yes, I got excited, because that made

sense. Okay.

Um, so you have to create some space, whether it’s through meditation, or I really like exercise for this too. But anything that’s not like super focused work, there’s a time and a place for focused work, but you have to find that balance where you’re leaving whitespace in your day as well, so that you can receive those out of nowhere thoughts that, you know, that are going to be the great ideas. So that’s one thing. And when you create a vacuum, when that which is to say that you create space for something in your life, like you might find a really simple example of this is if you got rid of your kitchen table, I would bet that within a week, you would have either somebody trying to get the get rid of their table and be like, hey, do you know anyone who’s looking for a table, I’ve got an extra one and I don’t want it. Or you would find it a really good deal on one at a store that was just like, the exactly like when you want it, or you would find some some easy way to replace it with something better. And that’s the reason why this works is because when you get rid of something with the total trust that everything is going to work out, then you’re leaving that space for the universe to fill it. And if it’s like a cup of water, if the cup is full, you can’t add more water to you have to dump the water out before you can

add more water in like get rid of the stale. So that new fresh can come.

Yeah, absolutely. Absolutely. And what the the reason why this may not work for some people, actually, that’s not going to work for some people because of this is because they’re getting rid of something with the attitude of this better work universe. You better come through for me. Yeah, yeah. It’s that’s not coming from a place of trust. Yeah, that’s pleat Miss trust.

And that’s, and that is easy to do when you’re like frustrated, or when you’re in that out of alignment when you’re in that low vibe place,

which is why you should never do this unless you’re in alignment. Yes. Yep. Which is another important point like, you, let’s go back to what you said in the beginning of the call, which was get into alignment, and then take action. Don’t do don’t make any decisions. Don’t get rid of anything, don’t buy anything. Don’t do anything, until you’re in alignment, because when you’re in alignment, you’re going to make the right decision.

So I have a funny story. Can I tell all right, so of course, um, I went to to coffee with a man this week, and we were talking he was saying he’s been married like 15 or 16 years. And when he was dating his wife, she kept having this feeling this like hunch this intuition that she should give away her TV to the detail might be fuzzy here, but it was like some people from church or something that needed it. And she kept saying, like, No, I’m not giving away my TV. That’s stupid. And it kept coming up coming up coming up. So finally she went over there one day with their TV and gave it to him. I was like, I don’t even know why I have to give this to you, but I just do. Right? And he said, Do you know that we’ve been Never ever purchased a TV since we’ve been married. We’ve won them. In raffles, we’ve gotten them. When we bought cell phones, they gave us a free flat screen. Like, everywhere we go. He said, we have so many TVs in our house. And I thought that’s so great, because it’s so true. Like they created this vacuum that had to be filled. Right? So it just is coming at them all the time. But he was joking. And he was like, you know, 16 years of free TVs, like we have a TV and that’s so funny.

Yeah. We’re gonna have like so many people going out and giving away their TV.

But I do think like, listen to that moment, listen to that intuition, you know, have that like moment where you’re like, Oh, I’m supposed to do this.

But again, don’t do it. If it’s coming from a place of like, I’m going to give this away because I expect something in return. Like you better come through for me. Yeah. Because that’s, that’s not it’s not going to work. If you’re, if you’re doing it from that space, right?

Yeah, yeah, I really like that a lot. So really get into alignment first, which is so good. We had that first conversation, because that really helps you understand how to do that. And then listen to the intuitive hunches. Right? And yes,

no matter how good they seem, no matter like I recent a bit of a tragic example, but I was watching a movie, the dictator with my husband a few weeks ago. And I mean, it’s like the super offensive movie, if you can about North Korea is that it’s no it’s um, Sacha Baron Cohen. Oh,

yes. Yes. I

totally know. Yes, super un-pc movie. But I mean, we’re able to have a sense of humor about it. So we we found it funny. Yeah. And anyway, during the movie, one of the characters look like, what this one of my friends that I used to work with. We used to walk home together almost every night because he lived near me. And his name was Osama. And I said to my husband, oh my gosh, like he reminds me of Osama. And you know, my husband agreed. He was just like, yeah, I see what you mean. And not just because they were Arab like, Yeah, but they actually looked like Yeah. And the next day, this would have been at about 830 at night, you know, after the kids went to bed, maybe nine o’clock. And I found out the next morning that my friend who samma had committed suicide. Oh, my gosh, the night before. Yeah. And I was like, Oh, my God. That was my intent. Like I did. This is not a guy I talk about all the time, like, yeah, like I talked to him a couple months ago, like just a very quick Facebook conversation. And like, it’s I talked to him maybe once a year. It’s not like

I yeah, so it’s not something that comes into your conversations on the regular. But you know, but because you had connected because you weren’t aligned. Right. You felt it.

You felt Well, I think it was probably right after he made his transition. And he probably, somehow he knew to kind of just reach out to me once he made his transition into non physical and

yeah, you know,

I know that for a lot of people listening. I know, it sounds like we’re making light of death. And it’s because once you

I kind of

I do Yeah, I do make light of death because it I’ve kicked the bucket croaked. Yeah, you know, whatever you want to call it. You know, I’ve talked to my grandmother and some, you know, even my cat died last year, like, they’re still there. So, you know, I totally be

the way I explained it to people is like when my mom was in the kitchen, and I was in, like our family room, and I would yell to her, and she would call back. I couldn’t see her, you know? Yeah. And I would say like, bring me a soda or whatever it was. I couldn’t see her, but I could hear her. And yeah, and I knew she was there because I felt a presence. Right? Yeah. And then she would come in the room, and then I would see her, but now it’s just that she doesn’t come in the room. But everything else is the same. Like I still feel her I still hear her. And when I say hear her I’m not saying like I hear voices. But when I’m in meditation where I I do get those nudges that I believe is her voice, right, you know, so I can I can go Oh, that was my mom. I can distinguish between that’s something my mother would never say that’s my grandma.

Yeah, you know? Yeah, yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. For my grandmother. Oh, my goodness. Like I started working with a psychic a couple months ago, and I just I just love her. And my grandmother. Like, she often has things to say.

She wishes you just like before, right? Just Oh my goodness. Yes. Here.

Yeah, it’s my psychic. But she had no way of knowing some some of these things about my grandmother. So it, it was very authentic. Yeah. And it was just, it was so funny because now My grandmother was like teaching my psychic about how things work in the spirit world. She’s like, showing her images and explaining all the details of like, this is how it works on the other side. Yeah, she’s making her a better psychic. Really. That’s really cool. That’s my grandmother has always been a social one.

So how can people find you Can they learn more?

Well, you can go to left brain tippie.com. And I’ve actually got a little freebie for your listeners as well. It’s called the get out of your own way guide. Because a lot of us just get in our own way. Because of all of these beliefs and fears that we have running in our head. They’re running the show, whether you realize it or not. And I’ve just given you a, in this little guide, a few concrete exercises to help you identify what some of these are so that you can start moving past them and stop it not have them running the show anymore and controlling the outcomes in your life. Yeah, I love that. Okay. Oh, no, it’s because it’s not like a super clean link. So I guess we could just link that up in the show notes. Yeah,

absolutely. Yep. I’ll do that. Okay. Oh,

thank you so much for being on this was super fun. We could talk for a couple more hours. There’s so much more. Good. So everybody needs to go to your website. Check it out. Get the freebie. And thank you again, so much. So.

So shall

let’s just say it again. Thank you so much cell sheet for being on the show.

You’re so welcome. Thank you for having me.

Thanks for spending some time with me today. Remember, you can find me inside my facebook group at SS lB community.com. That stands for start small live big community.com. And as always, here’s a little message from my husband.

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