073 : Q & A: Feeling petty, being overwhelmed, Believe when you don't & more - Betsy Pake

073 : Q & A: Feeling petty, being overwhelmed, Believe when you don’t & more


In this episode, I answer your questions that were sent since the beginning of the series on Law of Attraction.  I answer more about getting into the vibration you want, how to let go when you are feeling petty or someone is getting under your skin and talk more about meditation and hearing the voice that can guide you.

This episode is perfect for anyone who had some questions after listening to the other episodes and want to start thinking a bit differently about challenges in their life.

If you liked this episode, please share it with your friends!


Welcome to The Art of Living big. I’m your host, Betsy Pake, and this podcast is designed to share interviews and new ideas to help you redefine what could be possible for your life. Now, let’s go live big. today’s podcast is brought to you by audible. Get a free audio book download and a 30 day free trial at audible trial, comm backslash live big. There’s over 180,000 different titles to choose from. And you can listen on your iPhone, your Android, your Kindle, or your mp3 player. Now, here’s the show. Hey, everybody, welcome to the show. So today we’re doing a q&a. This is really the third episode in a series after I did the first two episodes on the law of attraction. So if you haven’t heard that, you may want to go back a few episodes and listen to those two. But these were some of the questions that I got after those episodes aired. So I wanted to thank everybody that submitted a question because I think we all have sort of similar experiences and and having somebody dare to ask the question means that there’s a whole lot of other people that have the same question, right? So how I did this was when I got a question, I cut and pasted it. And I put it in the document because I really wanted this to be a podcast q&a, that is as if you and I are just having this conversation. So sort of as it comes out of me. So I’ve got a whole list of questions here. But since I’ve put them in the document, I really haven’t read them. And so it’ll kind of be like reading them here for the first time. So I hope that this that this, that this helps y’all. Alright, so let’s see the first one. Okay, this really resonated with me. Thank you, I can’t wait to hear more. I know, this is something that will bring that will help to bring what I want in life. But I had a thought today, how do I change my subconscious, when I’m being petty, I have the logic. And the reason to know I shouldn’t be petty towards a certain person that wronged me in the past. But I also know if I’m being honest, it’s still there. Whether I know better or not, I think there’s two sort of issues. So the first one, I just want to take off the table. So if you had suffered a traumatic experience, or some sort of like real trauma, then that’s not what I’m talking about when I’m talking about what I’m about to say, okay? If this is just like someone’s getting under your nerves at work, right. So maybe they’ve done something at in the, in a meeting where they put you down, or something happened, where now they just get under your skin, right? What I’m gonna say, I want you to just be open to it for a moment, let’s just breathe, and be open for just a minute. But whenever someone is triggering something like that in you, anytime that someone’s it’s really getting under your skin, or something, that it’s always the same person, that just you they just rub you the wrong way. Really what they’re doing is shining a light on something inside yourself that you have been trying to hide from yourself. And so when they shine that light on, it makes you aware of it, and it makes you uncomfortable. So when this happens, I’d like to offer an alternative, really, if you could get really excited, because anytime you have any kind of contrast, or any kind of negativity like this, then you can go, Oh, this is really good. Because this is alerting me of something that I need to be aware of. Right? Because that’s all it is, is just letting you know, hey, this is something to be aware of. So sit back with it and see what comes up. Ask yourself like, why is this? What is it in me that perhaps I’m seeing in them that I don’t like? And then when you can cut to a point where you’re like, you know what, they are really competent. And I don’t feel very confident. And so it annoys me when they seem it almost seems cocky, right? So I’m not saying that’s what it is. I’m just giving an example. So when that comes up, go, you know what, and I love that. I love that about me. And when you love it, it will leave. So just allow it to leave. So something’s coming up, someone’s annoying you someone’s getting under your nerves. Try and see if you can say what is it that they’re bringing about in me get really excited about it. Because this is really good. This is letting you know there’s something in you that can be and we all have those things like constant I don’t think it matters how much we think or work on this kind of stuff. We all have those things in us where we’re something’s unsettled, right. And I and I used the confidence when because sometimes I noticed that if people seem cocky, which I think is really me thinking they’re too confident, which is me going I’m not confident enough, right? So that’s the thing that comes up for me. So when I see it, I go out and I love that about me and then it kind of dissipates in I can just allow that. And then when I can allow it, my whole nervous system can relax. And then I can say, Well, what could I do to feel more confident, or whatever it is. So that’s what I would say, I wouldn’t beat yourself up about having this thing that’s always bugging you and to feel like you’re petty, it’s not being petty. It’s your amazing body alerting you that something isn’t right. And it gives you an opportunity to take a look in there and figure out what it is and fix it and so that you feel better. So just get it to a place and when I say fix it, getting it to a place where you feel good, because that’s really what this is all about. Right. All right. I hope that helped.

I see you post a lot about your thoughts in meditation. What is it that you do? And how do you hear the word okay? So on Instagram, if you go to my Instagram, it’s it’s just my name. Betsy Pake. I’m very creative. With my social media names. It’s just Betsy Pake, but I typically will post something that I’ve asked about in meditation. Now, as far as meditation, that’s a whole other we could do a whole episode on that. But really, for me, what I do is I have been meditating for years, I did guided meditations for a long time. And now I do meditations where I just listened to like ocean sounds because oceans, my thing, I found that I was having a lot of what I felt were really profound insights about my own life at when I was in this and I called, and I call that like, talking to my intuition. I actually did a podcast on that last year, about how I would try to dig into my beliefs. That was basically the this at talking to my intuition. So I’ve been doing this for years. But what I found was when I was doing my meditations, and I was having that quiet time, and I was meditating, you know, an hour or so listening to the ocean sounds, I would have what felt like really profound ideas about my life, or about things I could improve on, or things I should know. But I wasn’t really remembering. As weird as that is. So I was sort of like coming out of my meditation and going, Oh, I know, that was some good stuff I don’t really remember. So what I started to do was, and some people do this with a pen and paper, which probably is a little more organic and good. But what I do is I just opened up my laptop, one day, I go into meditation with my hands on the keys. And then as I’m hearing things, I just type it. So when you ask how do you hear the words, it’s just, it’s like, when my, when I meditate, I can get my internal chatter down so low that I can’t really hear it. But I do hear this voice that I sort of imagined is coming out of my soul. So that is the voice that becomes much louder. And that’s the voice that I type out. Because in my day to day life, my internal chatter is so heavy, I don’t I can’t really hear it, or it’s harder for me. I’m getting better at it. But it’s harder for me to hear it. So that’s what I do. All right. I can’t get clear on what it is I want. I always hear people talking about goals. But I don’t have any Am I supposed to?

Oh, that’s really good. So I don’t know are you supposed to? And maybe when you’re hearing people talk about goals? Maybe they’re talking about something different than you think they’re talking about? And I would just say, do you want to have a goal like is what they have? Does that seem appealing to you. And if it does, then set some up. I mean, there’s loads of blog posts and things out there to kind of help you do that. But if you need help defining like, if you’d like to have something to focus on, but you don’t know what it is, then there’s a number of different ways you could do that. You could find something that makes you cry, like what makes what really pulls at your heartstrings. Maybe you’re you start volunteering with something with that, like that could be a great goal. You know, if it’s something with your health, maybe you don’t want to do like the regular goal of like running a five K or whatever that is, but maybe that’s like, you know, this past year, I’ve been doing a whole lot more holistic healing and some of that alternative stuff, right? And so maybe you want to look into some of that maybe there’s something you need to heal, maybe that could be a goal. So when they have a goal, they their interpretation of goal might be different than yours. And you might be interpreting that as Yeah, I don’t want that, then don’t do it. You don’t have to do anything. You can call it anything you want. So I think to answer your question, like no, you’re not supposed to you’re just supposed to do what feels good and makes you feel happy every day. That’s what you’re supposed to do. So if you feel good and you’re happy every day, then you’re doing great. Just keep doing that. All right, the next one. Sometimes I feel so overwhelmed that I have a hard time clearing my mind. and changing the vibration. It’s almost like I’m in panic mode, I can’t get the worry out of my head. Also the concept of saying and thinking the positive vibration, but really believing it, if that makes sense. Yes, that totally makes sense. Okay, so here’s the thing is that there’s two parts to this right? As you feel so overwhelmed, you have a hard time clearing your mind and changing the vibration. So there are a number of different ways that you can do that. The first one that I’m going to say that’s going to jump right out at me is meditate, that’s going to help clear your mind. So you can focus on the vibration. And so that doesn’t necessarily mean you know that you’re going to go sit down and meditate for an hour or two. But that could be just like five minutes of breathing. Like you’re in your car before you go into work. And you shut off the radio for a second, and you close your eyes and you just breathe. And maybe you get 10 or 20 breaths. I mean, that would probably be five. I mean, it depends how deep you breathe, but five minutes, just to center. And then you can actually, when that’s quiet, you can actually see what what is the true vibration, right? So am I really in panic mode? Or is that a fear? Right? That’s whenever I have a panic, or I have something I’m worried about. And money is a huge one that comes up for people, right? So I’m super afraid of money, I’m afraid of not having enough money, I’m afraid, this isn’t gonna work out, I’m gonna be broken, what’s gonna happen? Like, if you’re breathing, then you’re right here, and you’re fine. And the more you can learn to let go of that fear, the more you’ll be able to bring it back and get that vibration. Now, one thing you’re probably thinking is that you need to go from panic, fear to Woohoo, life is great. I love my life. But that’s not necessarily the that’s not you don’t jump from one to the other. Right? So I don’t go from needing to lose 50 pounds to needing to lose two pounds The next day, right? So like I there, everything takes there, there is a path for it, right? So if you’re feeling that sort of discouragement, on the emotional guidance scale, and you can look up, you know, Esther, and Jerry Hicks, we talked about Abraham Hicks in the second episode or first episode, there’s a book called ask and it is given. And there’s some really good exercises in there. But in there, they have an emotional guidance scale. And on the emotional guidance scale, if you’re in discouragement, or worry, well an overwhelm Well, if you can go to pessimism, or you can go to boredom, or just contentment, that’s, that’s higher on the vibration scale. So you don’t have to jump to the highest vibration, you just have to get a little bit better. So how could you move from discouragement or worry to a place of like frustration that’s actually better, or a place of just being content, right, and then you can move to optimism, then you can move to enthusiasm and passion and joy and all of those things. The other way to do this, if you don’t want to meditate, or if that’s not your thing, is just to get a book, get like a notebook, and just start writing gratitude. Now, when you are having this panic feeling, start writing down all the things you’re grateful for in your life, right now, you won’t be able to have both thoughts at the same time, and the other one will come down. So really, what we need to do is we just need to just calm down your nervous system, right. So you’re just being overstimulated. So if you could focus on gratitude, that would be something that could really help. sometimes at night, just having like a rampage of appreciation, where you just like start thinking of all the things and sometimes I’ll do this with my daughter or with my husband, where we’ll all say something and they’ll say something, and we’ll go back and forth and back and forth. It makes it sort of a game, it makes it fun raises your vibration, you’re doing it with somebody else, which is co creation, which raises your vibration, and then you’re focusing on the stuff that’s really great. And that raises your vibration. So it may not be that you’ll go from panic to like super passionate joy and enthusiasm. But you can maybe move up the scale to where you’re just like content or you don’t feel that unrest.

The other thing that you mentioned was saying and thinking the positive vibration, but really believing it. So if you’re lacking money, and I don’t know that you are I’m just using that as an example. So if you’re lacking money, and then you’re trying to get out of the panic mode of money, and then you tell yourself, like I really have a lot of money, like your brains gonna be like, Yeah, no, I don’t because I just checked my bank account. So really what you need to do is go really General, and so get a really wide wide lens on this. And so one of the things you might say is I really like the feeling when I have extra money in my bank account. I love when I’m able to go in and just pay all my bills with ease. I really like being able to go shopping and the feeling of being able to get what I need without worry like those are all things you can believe Those things are real. And those things are things you’ve already experienced. So it’s bringing your brain back into the things you’ve already experienced. Because the whole thing with fear, the whole thing with the fear and the panic and all that is that your brain is going Ah, but remember that one time where I didn’t have enough money, like that’s what it’s doing, right? Or I saw on TV before that those people didn’t have any money and they lost their homes and their job, like you’re pulling from something so your brain doesn’t. Your brain needs to be reminded of what you did what you have done with money, that’s good, or whatever the thing is for you, right? So I need to go General, remind my brain like, Oh, I really like that feeling surrounding money. I really like that feeling surrounding money. Oh, I really like that. I remember that. Then you got to start imagining, I feel like this is I’m going to talk more and more about this on future podcasts. Because I feel like this is the thing that people are really missing our brain. And I’ve said this before on the podcast, but our brains have, we have about 60 70,000 different thoughts a day. 90% of those are recycled dots. So all I’m doing is if I have had a bad thought pattern about money, I’m just going to be repeating it repeating it repeating it repeating it, right. So I’m suffering. So you don’t have to suffer, you can actually start imagining give your brain new thoughts. So you know all the things I already said meditation, appreciation, you know, gratitude, and do going general remembering the things where you’ve had a good experience with it, but then introduce new stuff. So at night, our brainwaves are first thing in the morning, our brainwaves are a little different than they’re going to be later in the day. So when those brainwaves are at a level where they are more suggest you can suggest things to your subconscious a little bit easier. start imagining, well, what if, what if I got a check in the mail today? And people go, Oh, you’re not getting any check in the mail. But I’ve had it happen where I’ve gotten like a rebate or refund. And maybe it was only 15 bucks. But hey, that’s a couple of Starbucks, right? So just be thinking what could happen today, maybe I get a new client that wants to prepay for the year, right, maybe they’re super committed, maybe I get, like some new people that want to learn about law of attraction. And they want to we start a new group in my course. And it’s really fun. And so now I’m not just thinking about the money, but I’m thinking about the whole part of it, what it could be how great that could be really like fleshing it out. Like I can imagine seeing all the people on a zoom call where I’m really able to create with them and help them and maybe some of them have ideas for businesses and I can help kind of plug them into different places and give them lots of feedback and things that I’ve already learned. And now I can imagine, you know, having like more and more people on a waitlist, because they want to get in because I’m giving them so much value like you know, so think through see that, that does that kind of got me excited. It raised my vibration just being on here. So use the imagination piece to imagine what if what could life be like how could it improve and be crazy because your brain doesn’t know the difference. So you know, inherit the beach house, y’all like you can do it in your brain and your brain doesn’t know the difference. And you’ve already been there. Once you’ve been there in your brain, you can go there in your body. So I hope that that helps. I hope that helps kind of think about how to get out of that panic, and how to start seeing and thinking those positive things and really believing it. I’m going to continue to do these Q and A’s. So if you want to send me a message, you can go to my website at Betsy Pake COMM And you can send a message there. And in fact right now there is a voicemail, you can leave me a voicemail so we’re gonna see if that gets utilized. We’ll leave it up for a little bit. But just leave your questions and let’s do this sort of as a regular thing, and see if maybe we can’t help really pinpoint some of the things that are holding you back so that you can continue on to live your big life. Thanks so much for listening. Thanks for spending some time with me today. Remember, you can find me inside my facebook group at SS lB community.com as stands for start small, live big community.com. And as always, here’s a little message from my husband.

That’s it.

Transcribed by https://otter.ai


Meet Betsy!

I'm Betsy Pake!

*Ocean obsessed

*Probably hanging out with my dogs


*Deep thinker

Hey There!

About Betsy

Hi I’m Betsy and I’m a subconscious change expert.
By day you can find me digging deep into the unconscious beliefs and identity of my clients so they can move past self-sabotage and lack of confidence and gain traction in their career and life.