153: When You Are Ready To Make Change


Episode 153

Here is the link to the Facebook Group:  www.TheArtofLivingBig.com

And here is the link to my calendar: www.Betsypake.com/letstalk

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The link to my free training: www.Betsypake.com


You’re listening to Episode 153 of The Art of Living bag. If you guys get something out of this episode and you like it, please share it, please post it on social media, tag me on Instagram or just share it with your friends. If you leave a review on iTunes, screenshot it and email it to us at support at Betsy Pake calm and we will send you back a special hypnosis, self hypnosis audio that you can download on changing your beliefs. It’s so powerful and I have somebody inside my group that downloaded it and said that they got like the fuzzy feeling, you know, when you do a really good meditation

and you’re like I got the


So I know that it’s super duper powerful.

Now, if you guys are interested

in learning a little bit more about working with me, I do have a free training on my website. If you go to Betsy Pake calm, it’s right there, it’s about turning your crisis into your biggest transformation. So in there, I share five shifts, those are shifts that my clients take, and it is the format and the process that I move my clients through so that they say things like this has been the most magical few weeks of my

life, that they say I move

forward past things that I never thought I would let go. I had somebody recently that said, I feel neutral. And although you might think like who wants to feel neutral, when you’ve been carrying something really heavy for years and years and years and years, and then you feel neutral, it feels light and amazing.

And from there, you can create a really incredible life that you want. So if you want to understand how I do that, and how I work with my clients, you can go to my website, it’s a free training. It’s only like about 40-45 minutes, and I’ll give you all the goods there. So all right. Without further delay, let’s go to the show. Welcome to the art of living big. I’m your host,

Betsy Pake. I’m an international expert

in manifesting from your subconscious. And this podcast

is designed to help you think differently about

what could be possible for your life. Now, let’s go live big. Hey, everybody, welcome to the show. So I’m here today, it’s Tuesday morning, and I was gone. This weekend, I went to the beach, I went to visit my in laws who live in North Carolina right on the shore. And it was so fun. It was a pretty quick trip. And it’s long. So I live outside Atlanta and to get there is like an eight or nine hour drive eight hours, I guess if we like push right through. So it was a long weekend.

But I came home and yesterday I had a great day and just getting like re acclimated and this morning, I was like I need to do a podcast. And it was that it was I need to because I like to be somewhat consistent, right? So Monday or Tuesday. And I have even felt like I need to be more consistent. Like I need to make sure it’s every Monday morning or every. Um, but I always want to bring you something when I have a thought, right. And because it’s been so busy, I haven’t had that moment where I could just like, slow down and try to have a thought to figure out what it is I think I need to share.

So I thought I’m gonna start,

I’m gonna start the mic, I’m going to turn the mic on.

So let’s just see what we’re gonna talk about today. And I know this is weird, you might have to fast forward, let me just be quiet for a second. When you’re ready, so when you’re ready, is when things will start to shift for you. So okay, if you’re listening, you’ve got some things in your life that you

are unsatisfied with,

right? Everybody has things in their life that aren’t going exactly the way they want. And maybe it’s your relationships, or maybe it’s your health, or maybe it’s your career, or maybe it’s just something that you want to do or be or have experience in your life and you’re not getting it and you’re dissatisfied.

And sometimes we get so beat down, maybe you’ve tried to change things for you know, over and over and over again, maybe for years, and weren’t ever to make the shift. And so now you’ve just sort of you, you’re dissatisfied, but you’re not really doing anything about it. And every single time you think about this thing, it sort of nags at you.

You’re dissatisfied, you’re unhappy with it. And maybe you see other people and that starts to come into your awareness a whole lot more right? people that do have that thing and are living that life and are excited and joyful. And you wonder like, why is that not for me? Like I guess that’s just not for me. And maybe that makes you even feel more sad about it because there’s also this longing to have it but also

this feeling that it’s not

meant for You

so even though you have this desire, you don’t feel like it’s even attainable. And now you’re just worn out, and you don’t feel like you even know how to begin to move forward. Now, I think this is a really common place to be. And I believe that when you are ready is when you’ll start to find the answers, it’s when you’ll start to see the path and the way to shift to move forward.

I’ve had lots of things in my life that I’ve wanted to do. And I, I literally would say, like, I want this so bad, and I’m not ready, there is a point where it’s almost like a line in the sand, right where you’re like, I can be really uncomfortable, right in the right now, or I can cross over that line, and I can be uncomfortable in the unknown, but he don’t know, anytime we’re gonna make change, there’s, it’s gonna be uncomfortable, right. But there is something about having the comfort of understanding and knowing you’re uncomfortable.

And so you have to be ready to cross that line. To go into the unknown to go, I’m going to be uncomfortable in ways that I’m not aware of yet, and probably ways that I haven’t even experienced yet. Because if I had, I would be uncomfortable in those ways, and I would have the thing, or be the person. And so I just want to ask you to reevaluate all of the places in your life, where you don’t feel like it’s really, like you’re living full, right? You’re not living this big life, in every area.

And I will tell you, it is hard to live big in every single area of life, right, we’re always going to have some things that are feeling better, and some things that are feeling less than, but one of the things that I do often and I used to do it every month, and

I haven’t done this in a

while. But now that I’m

this is coming into my awareness, I’m gonna do it again. So you’ve probably heard like the wheel of life. So there’s this a wheel, and sometimes I do it where I just do like a graph, right? So I take all the different areas of my life, I take my health, I take my finances, my relationship, my romantic relationship, my relationship with family and friends.

My spiritual life, my career, I take those areas, and I just rate it on a scale of one to 10. So how is my health and fitness? How does that feel right now on a scale of one to 10. Now, for me, it doesn’t mean that I’m living my like, I don’t have my dream bought in. But I feel like I’m on a path, I have a plan. So for me right now, that would read pretty high win rate as high as maybe if I was like really feeling great about my body, but it would rate higher, because I feel like I’m in control. Right?

Like, I feel like I’m having an understanding of it. And I feel like I’m taking action on it. Right my relationship right now the same way I could tell you some stories about that we’re gonna have Craig get on the show. Because marriage is hard, y’all and, and sometimes hearing about other people’s heart makes it feel like you’re not so alone. But we’ve made some big changes, and it’s been really awesome. So I would rate my relationship really high right now, probably, you know, six months ago,

I might not have done that.

You know, so look at all those different areas of your life. And you may have the same areas as me, you might have different areas, and rate them see where they are scale of one to 10. And you know, you can shade these in. So you make like this bar graph, it makes it really obvious where you’re struggling. Now, everything isn’t going to be a 10. For me, living a big life is having a balance between all of the numbers across the board. Right? So how can you have a balance, and typically, what I like to do is if there is one that is way lower than the others.

So if my spirituality

is way lower, I would try and see how I can raise that up. So it’s more in line with the others. If my relationship is way lower, how can I raise that up. So that can give you an idea of really where you are in all of those areas. And sometimes when we have a name for it, when we actually address it, or we identify it in our brains, it makes it tangible.

So, you know, you may have this general feeling of like, I’m not happy with my health and fitness, right. But unless you read it, it doesn’t become something as tangible that your brain can latch on to. So remember, we always want to make things so that our subconscious can start scanning and looking and showing you opportunities to change the thing.

So if I just have a general feeling of like, I hate my life by not giving myself something tangible. So go through and make your chart you can also Google wheel of life and that’ll give you like an empty chart. You can fill in and just shows you it A wheel. So you could imagine if that wheel was turning, would it be a bumpy ride? Or would it be a pretty smooth ride, right?

So it just gives you a visual. But what this does is it gives your brain a place to be able to latch on to, to be able to start to look for opportunity. Because here’s the thing, the opportunity is everywhere around us, there’s opportunity, an abundance, opportunities you don’t even see.

And unless we can identify, and unless you’re ready to cross over unless you’re ready to make that change, to go, you know what now I know, my relationships, only a four, and I’m not going to live like that. I want to find start finding opportunities on how I can make that better. And you know that there’s a whole lot of things we could get into just in that area. But I think that what we’ve got to do is you’ve got to figure out when Enough is enough. When are you not willing to live like that anymore.

And when you’re not willing to live like that anymore, when you’re willing to go like I know this is super uncomfortable. And this is the known uncomfortable, when I’m willing to cross over into the unknown. That is when I will start to become who I want to become. And crossing that line crossing over into all of the ways that you might be uncomfortable that you might not know what’s going to happen, it’s going to cause your brain to get

a little

freaked out. You know, I’ve talked about this before, but when I was making all those changes in like the back end of my business, and I had hired that coach. And I would like I would say to my husband, like I don’t even know what my brains doing. Like I’m so freaking out. Like, I would almost have like,

I could really feel like anxiety or really,

really overwhelmed. Because I was crossing over I was but I was so sick of being where I was, it was worse, being sick of where I was and feeling like I wasn’t living up to my potential. feeling like I wasn’t having the joy that I deserved to have feeling like I wasn’t having the impact that I wanted to have. feeling like I wasn’t like living this life that I knew I was supposed to live like I knew my I know my purpose.

And it was so uncomfortable that crossing over that line and becoming even more uncomfortable for a shorter period for a short period of time. Totally made it worth it. So get clear on where all the areas are in your life. And then ask yourself, Am I comfortable being in this? uncomfortable? Is this good enough for right now. And it might be? It might be like right now, this is all I can deal with? Like, I’m not willing to do that. And if you can say that,

you can release the resistance, right? Because

if I

am like I am so unhappy, I hate my job. My people I work with suck, I hate the commute, all of those things. But right now the other areas of my life are so stressful that for me to look for another job and get another job and train and do all of those things is an uncomfortableness that I’m not willing to go through. Well, if I can say that, then suddenly I’ve released the resistance. And I’ll start to notice that I’ll find happier things

about where I am.

So my brain is it wants to know what to do. my subconscious wants to know what to do.

And if you’re wishy washy, if you’re like,

I hate this, I hate my weight. But I’m

not really ready to do anything about it. But I hate it. But

I wish I had that. Pick a side. Which side of the line Do you want to be on? Are you sick of it? Have you reached the end of your limit? And I’ll tell you what, almost always, when you reach the end of your limit, you can’t figure out how to cross over by yourself. Like if you know how to cross over by yourself, you’d have crossed over by yourself already. This is why I have had a million coaches in my life. I’ve bought a million coaching programs, I’ve read a million books, I’ve probed friends that have done the things I want to do to the point where they start to ignore me like I can’t help you anymore.

Stop asking me but I will continue to probe and expand what it is that’s in my awareness. So what do I need to know? What is it that I need to know right now? So get clear. Get your life we’ll figure it out. Look at your life wheel does it roll smoothly? If it doesn’t roll smoothly, then it’s time for you to make a choice. Are you going to stay where you are? Are you going to stay in this uncomfortable and that’s okay. You might not be ready to move on. It’s okay. And when if you are ready to move on, what do I need to do

to make this shift? Remember, you’re not

going to know the details. You’re not going to be able to Most likely to do it on your own, you need a friend, you need a book, you need a program, you need a coach. Like, that’s just the reality. Because otherwise, you’re going to slip back into the old way, you’re going to move forward, you’re going to slip back, because you’ve got ingrained patterns. You know, lots of times I’ll talk to people

that contact me about coaching.

And I, I will, I know that if they get off the phone, they won’t move forward. Like, I know that they will talk to me, they’ll be super pumped, and they won’t make a decision. I know, I don’t even I might have done that. Nope. Even if they say I’m going to call you tomorrow, I’m like, I know, they’re not going to, because your patterns take over your patterns of I’m gonna say stuck in this because this is the known, this is what I know. And my brain wants to keep me in what I know.

And if I want to move out of what I know, then I’ve got to have leverage, I’ve got to have something else have got to have something else to follow. So ask yourself, and when you look at your wheel, am I okay being in this? And if you’re not, how can I shift? What do I need to do? And what do I need to know? Now? We don’t know what we don’t know, right?

So here’s what I would do. And this is what I do lots of times is if I’m like, I am ready to make this shift, I get really quiet. And I say I’ll talk to my spirit guides. I mean, I talked to all the things like spirit guides, my mom, my grandmother, like all of my loved ones, anybody that knows me, it’s passed over, like any anything, I need your help bring it into my awareness, the path that I need to take to make this change, bring it into my awareness.


make me aware that this is going to be a way that I can do it and give me the strength to take the steps. You know, my mom used to say when I was growing up, never pray

for the thing you want.

She would say pray that you can handle what you get. And I think there’s some truth in that, I would probably argue with her a little bit about that. Because praying is really asking, and I think you can ask for what you want. And you can ask for help in identifying where to, to get the help, where to move forward how to make that happen, you can be a lot more actively engaged in that. And you can read, I think she’s right in that, like pray for the resist the resistance to go away,

right. So whatever happens make me Make me

joyful, because that’s all I want anyway, like, I want to lose some weight, right? And so, like, make me aware of some ways that I could do that, that would feel fun and happy. And in the meantime, make me deal with whatever happens make me joyful In the meantime, that has worked for me, it has actually been working really well. So if you are in one of my coaching programs inside the Learning Portal, I’ll be posting here in the next three weeks, probably my program for my mindset that I’ve been doing.

So you’ve heard me talk about that how I just started working on my subconscious to change the way I was exercising and eating is working. It’s profound. In fact, go into my group, if you go into my group, if you go into the art of living big calm, it will bring you right into my facebook group. I will share one of the one of them the self hypnosis audios that I’ll do that I’ve been doing. I’m going to re record it because I use my name in it because I made it for myself, but I’ll rerecord it.

I may I’ll make it available to people inside the group. So give me like a couple weeks to do that a week or two. by next week by next week. I’m gonna have it in there by next week. So join me now will you think of it? I’m going to post that in there. If you’re one of my coaching clients, you’re going to get the full program. I’m just putting it all together. And like I said, I have to re record all of the audios because I used my name in them. And I used specific things right, because I made them specifically for me.

So it is profound. The weird thing is just to give you an update. So I started that maybe five weeks ago. And the first couple weeks, two or three weeks, I did the meditations every single day and then I moved to about probably four times a week. I noticed after about three weeks I started really feeling like working out again, which is something that I haven’t really felt like doing it a long, long time. I’ve still been working out like almost every day I packed stuff when I went to the beach like it would became who I was. Remember we will always want to change at the level of I Am. And then just recently, I really felt like I’m ready to take control my eating.

So that was a weird shift because it wasn’t I’ve got to do this. It wasn’t a oh my god I’m gonna have to control that like it just felt like flow. Like, how can I make this fun? How could I really keep track of this in a way that feels really aligning and good. And so I came up with a, I came into my awareness, a way to do it, that felt really good to me. And I’m having some success. And most importantly, when I do my wheel of life, my health and fitness ranks so much higher because I feel super in flow about it.

So remember, like, everything isn’t always going to be perfect. But if you want to change and you want to cross over, and you want to take that leap, and you want to create a difference in your life, don’t try to do it alone, get a book, get a friends, get a buddy, get a coach, do something. Because if you don’t, then your old patterns will just take over your old way of doing things, you’ll be more comfortable being in the uncomfortable that you already know. And you won’t cross over the line to start shifting.

So when you’re ready, you’ll be ready. So Alright, you guys, join me inside the Facebook group. If I can help you if you’d like to jump on the phone with me and learn a little bit more about some ways that I find that you need to shift. I can help you do three things. I have a breakthrough call where you we focus on the areas that you need to shift, help you identify a couple beliefs that are holding you back, and then let you know what you need to know to get unstuck.

And I can show you how I can help you with that. If it’s a fit for both of us. Cool. If it’s not, that’s cool, too. But if you’d like to jump on my calendar, you can do that. I have a couple spots open over the next couple days you go to my website, Betsy pake.com

backslash, let’s talk.

So super easy. You can see my calendar, it’ll ask you a couple questions. That’s just to help me prep

so that I can actually help you identify

those shifts when we’re on the phone.

So All right, you guys have an awesome week. And as always, here’s a little message from my husband.

That’s it.


Meet Betsy!

I'm Betsy Pake!

*Ocean obsessed

*Probably hanging out with my dogs


*Deep thinker

Hey There!

About Betsy

Hi I’m Betsy and I’m a subconscious change expert.
By day you can find me digging deep into the unconscious beliefs and identity of my clients so they can move past self-sabotage and lack of confidence and gain traction in their career and life.