171: Being a beginner - Betsy Pake

171: Being a beginner


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You’re listening to Episode 171 of The Art of Living big. Hey, everybody. All right, if you have not been on Instagram, I’m going to talk a little bit on today’s show about my trip to Key West and sort of what that started for me. But if you haven’t, if you’re on Instagram, you can go to my Instagram stories and you’ll see the little circle right on my bio. This is Key West and you can see my whole trip from Key West is on there if you are interested. But before we get started, I just want to let you Well first of all, I want to let you know that I’m wearing a Momo. Alright, so if you’re on Instagram, you know this story as well.

But I have a friend that I found several years ago on Instagram. And she she was so I stumbled across the hashtag Moo Moo’s across America. And this woman was wearing a moo moo, like in front of like the Grand Canyon or in front of like, I mean, weird, crazy. fitly You know, like the world’s largest ball of twine and a moo, moo, whatever. So naturally, I was like, this woman needs to be my friend. So I totally like, started commenting on everything. I was all in on the moose cross America.

We ended up being friends. I’ve met her several times. She lives in New Orleans, and I’ve been to New Orleans. But she started her own line of mus, and it’s called House of Lu, you can find it at under the mu mu.com. I’m not being paid for this promotion. But I truly I decided finally I’m like, I need to buy one of our members. So I got it. And let me just say you can call it a calf can if that makes you feel better. But let me just say that it made me want to jump up and click my heels together.

I don’t know what it is about it, but it just made me happy. And I can see myself being who I am walking around keywest in my really brightly colored MooMoo slash calf can and so I just wanted to share that with y’all in case because I’m I’m gonna I’m gonna help bring this into fashion because it’s amazing.

All right, so you can find her under the Moo moo.com and if you want to know what’s under my moo moo you can go to Instagram at Betsy Pake and find out. Alright, so all of that non paid promotion just an excitement I wanted to share with you guys, you can listen to a free training that I have on how to shift your subconscious to create something that you want and to move out of a place where you feel stuck or in a crisis.

So you can find that just by going to my website, just Betsy Pake calm and it is right there on the front page right next to my head, you can see and you can just click that link and get the free training. So I hope that that serves you. If you watch that and you’re interested in getting on the phone with me I do offer a free clarity call it is a breakthrough call it is simply to help you get super clear on where you’re stuck. And what that means, right?

So many times people will reach out and they’ll be stuck. But if we can do the layers and kind of toggle down into that we can find out what really is the issue. So that’s my goal on the call. If you’re interested in that. You can go to Betsy Pake comm backslash, let’s talk. Alright, so now let’s go to the show. Welcome to the art of living big. I’m your host, Betsy Pake. I’m an international expert in manifesting from your subconscious. And this podcast is designed to help you think differently about what could be possible for your life. Now let’s go live big. Hello fellow adventurers. Welcome to today’s show.

I’m getting back into the swing of things. You know, last week was my first week back after vacation. And I was in Key West. If you listen to last week’s episode, or you follow me on Instagram, you know about my trip to Key West. But I was like still like coming off the Key West High. You know, it was just so great. And yeah, so if you’ve never been there, you need to go. You need to put that on your radar. And this morning, you know, I brought my dogs for a walk.

I’m going to talk a little bit about my morning, but I brought my dogs for a walk and I don’t like walking in my neighborhood. And I resisted walking in my neighborhood, I think because it reminds me that I’m in my neighborhood. You know, it’s sort of I have wanted to move for so long, that I think I sort of created this like, it’s like I have a swamp like a moat around my house and I can’t leave, right. So this morning, I thought if I was in Key West, I would get my coffee in my banana cafe mug.

If you follow me on Instagram, I got a mug from banana cafe in Key West. And I would walk my dogs down the street and drink my coffee. And so I was like, I’m gonna do that here. And so I did and it was really good. I know this sounds silly but it really made a difference like it made it easy to cross the moat outside my house and go up the street. I had my coffee. I was looking at my mug like I was Remembering, right? I was feeling the, the temperature and like just trying to be in the moment. So it was just sort of a great mindfulness exercise.

And luckily, you know, I have two dogs, a little dog and then a bigger dog. And Henry, the bigger one, I have one of those leashes that goes around your waist. And so it was totally easy to drink my coffee. He’s a good boy on the leash, so he doesn’t pull. And I was just able to, like, drink my coffee and walk. And it was awesome. It was fabulous. But then I came back in, I want to tell you a little I want Today’s episode is about being a beginner. And as I was walking, and I’ve been thinking about this over the past week, so well let me back up.

So when I was in Key West, I was laying by the pool. And this woman walked by a couple times, and I don’t know how old she was, she was probably in her 30s. I’m gonna say she was super cute. And I could tell she was the crossfitter. And if you’ve listened to the show, for some time, you know that I am a former crossfitter I used to own a CrossFit box. And she she, you know, she walked by and walked by walk by. And so finally I was like, hey, because I like to talk to people. Do you?

Are you a crossfitter? Is that how you look like that? Because you look really good. And she was like, Yes, cool, come to find out. She lives like 10 minutes from my house. I mean, how wild and wacky is that? She said, she goes down to Key West all the time. It’s like her favorite place, she always stays at the resort where we were staying.

And so we started talking, and she was saying about how, you know, she really got into CrossFit. Not it wasn’t even that long ago. And she was just talking about how quickly her body changed. And I remember that, you know, I remember that from when I started CrossFit back in like 2009, right, like, my body changed really quick, because that’s what happens when we introduce something that’s totally different and a different way of working out.

And so we talked a little bit, and she told me that she does an online, an online CrossFit gym. And it’s called street parking. And I actually was a member of street parking, I don’t know, maybe like a year and a half ago. So after I sold my box, and then a little bit of time went by and I was lifting and I was competing.

And then when that slowed down, I joined and then I just found out I wasn’t doing the workouts. But when I saw her I was inspired and I was inspired because she looked really good. But I was inspired because I remembered what it felt like to feel like that. So this is sort of a weird thing. But I remembered what it felt like to feel lean, and I’m not fat, okay, I want to just like, if you have you know, me, or you’ve seen me on Instagram, you’re gonna be like, Betsy, you’re not fat.

I know that I’m not obese, right. But I do know that I have some weight to lose. But more importantly, when I saw her, it made me want to feel the way I used to feel. So here’s the thing about human nature, we’re either running away from something, or we’re running towards something else. So I want to lay this out for you, in terms of working out just because it’s an easy one to think about losing weight. But this can apply to anything. So if I’m running away from that means I feel uncomfortable.

I feel yucky. I don’t like how I feel. And what happens is we get motivated, that motivates us for a minute. And if you think of like a wave, right, so we get motivated work going up on the wave. But then what happens is we lose like five pounds. And then we don’t, it doesn’t feel as bad. Right? We don’t feel as bad as we did our jeans fit better.

We don’t feel so chunky, right? We don’t feel so bloated or whatever. And so then our motivation goes down. So now if you can imagine the wave going down on the downside, right, and then we gain that little bit of weight back and then we get motivated again, and then we go up and then we get so what happens when we are only motivated from running away from we tend to have ups and downs. So when I work with my clients, one of the things we really want to do is to really create in their subconscious and I embedded in their subconscious

implant for the moving towards. So when that woman was walking back and forth, I all of the sudden was no longer running away from not feeling good because that wasn’t motivating me anymore. I had done the like ups and downs right? I suddenly saw I was moving towards moving towards feeling really good moving towards health moving towards Do you see the difference? So then so as we were sitting there and we talked and she was so nice and We talked a little bit about what she was doing and what program she was following on street parking. And I was like, I’m gonna do that I’m gonna, so I had this moment of motivation, right?

So I joined Well, I sat there in my chair, and I thought, I’m gonna start when I get home. And so all last week, I thought about it every day, like, I’m supposed to start on Monday, like I set it up. So it would actually start on Monday when I get back. Um, and then I was like, I don’t want to. And then the next day, I don’t really want to, but I want to feel good again. But I was like, I don’t really want to do that. And then I look at the workout. And I was like, I want to do it.

So by like, Thursday, I sat down and I was like, Okay, I need to, it’s okay. So what I did was I relieved myself of the guilt of it, okay, if you don’t want to do it, you don’t have to write, we don’t have to do anything we don’t want to do I mean, heck, we don’t even have to breathe if we don’t want to breathe. So you don’t have to do it. But explain that this is what I say to my brain. But explain to me why, what’s the resistance and I had to be really quiet. Because when I was doing this, there was a lot of thoughts about it, right? But when it came down to it, I thought,

it’s going to be hard.

And not just it’s going to be hard, the workouts gonna be hard, because even when you’re great at CrossFit, the workout is hard. That’s the beauty of it. I wasn’t afraid of a hard workout, I was afraid of a really, really, really easy workout being hard. Do you see the difference? What I was really afraid of was being a beginner. I had this history, I was doing CrossFit. Before CrossFit was CrossFit. I was doing CrossFit before CrossFit was Reebok before everybody was doing CrossFit, right.

And there’s some weird pride in that for some reason, right? And so for me now to be a beginner, like that just felt so crappy. And it made me think thoughts like, How did this happen? How did this happen, that I’m a beginner, right. And I’m not going to be any good at this. And who wants to do something that they suck at? Right?

Nobody wants to do something you suck at, right? And it’s gonna take me forever to get to where I was. And it’s gonna be really painful. So me, being a beginner, is what was stopping me from taking the step to move forward. And so I am sharing that with you. Because I want to ask you, what is it that you want to do? I may not be working, I might have nothing to do with that. But where is being a beginner? And all of the thoughts that go with being a beginner?

Where is that slowing you down or stopping you all together? I mean, I sped up a little bit, I joined, joined street parking, and spent my money, I thought that would be enough, but it wasn’t enough money, you know, to really get me motivated. So then I just waited. So the truth is, is that if I want to grow, if I want to be better, if I want to feel really good, if I want to move towards health, if I want to have a better relationship, if I want to be experiencing cool things with my kid that are different if I want to build my business in a new way and in a different way, or I want just want it to grow, I’ve got to be okay, being a beginner.

And if I have a fear of being a beginner, then my life is going to be really, really limited. I’m going to be right where I am right here forever. And that just doesn’t sound very appetizing to me. So I want you to look at your life. And one thing that I found really helpful for me to go, okay, where else is it that I’m afraid of being a beginner?

And I was like, Oh, no where else? And then I asked myself this question, Where have you stayed the same? Where is the place you want something different, but you’ve stayed the same. And that may be the place where you are fearful of being a beginner. And what happens I think is that we see people that are successes and especially in this in this like day and age of social media. We go there so successful, but we don’t see that they were all beginners. I mean,

unless you were born some sort of like genius savant in some area, like you were a beginner. You know, I talked about Oprah a lot just because that’s such a, like everybody knows who she is. And I’ve mentioned this before, but if you’ve never listened to the podcast, making Oprah it’s only like five episodes. And it describes her ascent into becoming the goddess Oprah that we know today.

But she came from very, very humble beginnings and had to make a lot she was a beginner in a lot of things and she allowed herself to even fall back and be a beginner. So she was on the news. And she was doing something and she didn’t want to do that she wanted to shift. And so she allowed herself to be a beginner yet again. And she used intention to create what she wanted. If If you are interested in her story at all, you really should listen to that podcast.

But being a beginner, most successful people you’ve ever seen, or you’re looking at, or thinking about right now, we’re beginners, you know, I get a lot of messages from other coaches that are trying to build their business. And I’m not where I want to be. But man, I’m way farther along than I was when I was a beginner, and I was a beginner, I was a super beginner. So allowing myself to be a beginner allows me the ability to grow, it allows me to be to be better and to be what it is, I really want to be.

So I want you to think about where it is you’re stagnant. And where you’re stopping yourself from being a beginner, I want you to understand that you don’t have to be good. And you don’t need to, you don’t need to be great to get started. So this morning, it is a new Monday. And so I looked up the workout.

And I thought, all right, I am going to allow myself to be a beginner. And I’m going to use the lightest weights, I’m using dumbbells because I don’t have my barbells because that’s a whole other story. I have my dumbbells. And I’m like I’m using the lightest weight. And I’m just going to do it, I’m not going to try to be fast, I’m not going to try to all I’m going to try to do is finish.

That’s all I got to do. And if I if I can do that, then I have been successful today. And it freed me up. I didn’t have these expectations. I didn’t have to be super fit. I didn’t have to wear like my old workout stuff in a junk bra like and have abs. I was like just okay, being a beginner, what does a beginner look like? How does a beginner act, a beginner is open to learning is open to having things feel a little bit difficult.

But knowing that what I did today, if I do that same exact work, if I’m consistent this week, and I’m a beginner all week, next week, if I do that same exact workout, it’ll be easier. So I already will be moving towards what I want and moving away from being just a beginner. So this made me think though, where else can I just practice at being a beginner?

What other areas of my life Am I successful, but I can go I’m a beginner, I’m gonna pretend I’m a beginner because I believe that one of the downfalls is thinking that you’ve got it all figured out. Like I have heard this, this is not my quote. But I say this a lot is that one of the worst things that you can say is, I already know this, oh, I already know this, that will limit you more than anything else in the world. Right. And I’ll tell you that I have been a coach for a long time.

And my expertise is an LP, and it is a I say my expertise is NLP, it is an LP, but I do it in a different way. And there’s an energy component to it and intention component to it. So I believe I do it in a little different way. But it made me go, where am I? Where could I be a beginner in that. And I thought I’m going to get more training, I’m going to become even better. And so I looked up and signed up for more training,


was an investment in myself, but I had to step back and go, I want to grow in that area. And I’m not being a beginner.

So I’m gonna, I’m gonna toggle back

and be a beginner. So

that was another area I found that I could be a beginner and just go and learn and go in with an open mind and say I’m going to just learn stuff. The other thing is that so now I’m practicing being a beginner. But the other thing is I went to when I did my workout, that the way that street parking works is it’s there’s like a whiteboard.

So you can go and see what other people logged as their workout as their weights. And He notes that they wrote, right. And so I went back and I looked at the beginners. And so what did they do? Did they write anything? Because people will write little notes like I wrote, I’m practicing being I’m allowing myself to be a beginner.

And so I went back to see what can

I learn

from the other beginners and some people wrote like modifications that they did, right? So I could learn about how to be a better beginner by by listening to other beginners, right? So we don’t have to be an expert, and you don’t have to be an expert to help other beginners. You too could be a beginner right?

Maybe my note, I’m allowing myself to be a beginner, will help some other beginner. You know, in our culture, we lift up experts like they’re the greatest thing ever. But there’s value in the entire continuum. there’s value in all of it. So what if what you have now and where you are has value and you can help somebody else. And you allow yourself to be a beginner, and you allow yourself to grow and learn something new, and you allow yourself to not have to know it all?

How could that impact your life and change your life. So use your beginner eyes today, learn from other beginners. The other thing is to celebrate, you know, I get done that workout, I celebrated, I send a message to my husband, I did a little happy dance, I jumped up and down with my dogs. I mean, I put my hands in the air and I yelled like I did it, I can do hard things. You guys, I used five pound dumbbells. And I celebrated the hell out of that.

Because I want that neural pathway solid in my mind, again, that I do things I follow through, I make a promise to myself, and I do it and then I celebrate it. And that helps. It helps to create that neural pathway and to make it that that is something who I am. who I am. And if following through. And being a beginner and allowing myself to be excited about all of it. I’m not going to just celebrate when I when I’m when I’m

you know do it with 90 pound dumbbells

or whatever, like I’m gonna celebrate all along the way. Why not? That’s what we’re here is to learn and grow. So why wouldn’t you be celebrating as you as you grow? So I celebrated the heck out of that, probably to an extent that you would think it was a little bit too much. But it felt so fun. And it made it fun.

And it made me excited for tomorrow. So I want you to share, where are you learning? Where are you allowing yourself to be a beginner and celebrate the heck out of that. create something new for yourself and allow yourself to learn. We don’t have to be experts. And we definitely don’t have to be experts just starting out.

We can learn more and observe absorb more by allowing ourselves to be a student. So toggle back, be a student and allow yourself to be a beginner because I think that is how you live a big life. All right, you guys, if you’re in Facebook, jump into the Facebook group, let me know. Where are you going to allow yourself to be a beginner I want to know. See you guys soon. Thanks so much for listening to this episode. If you found it a value, please share it with your friends,

tag me on Instagram or leave a review on

iTunes or any of your listening apps. If you leave a review, and you take a screenshot, please email it to us at support at Betsy pake.com. And we will send you a self hypnosis audio that will help you break down any limiting beliefs that you have. So thanks so much for sharing. Thanks so much for leaving your review. And don’t forget to join us inside our Facebook group by going to the art of living big.com and I’ll see you there.


Meet Betsy!

I'm Betsy Pake!

*Ocean obsessed

*Probably hanging out with my dogs


*Deep thinker

Hey There!

About Betsy

Hi I’m Betsy and I’m a subconscious change expert.
By day you can find me digging deep into the unconscious beliefs and identity of my clients so they can move past self-sabotage and lack of confidence and gain traction in their career and life.