191: Creating a new reality - Betsy Pake

191: Creating a new reality


Listen to todays episode here…


Welcome to The Art of Living big podcast. My name is Betsy Pake, and I’m an author, speaker, and a master mindset coach focused on helping you understand and design your life with the power of your subconscious. This podcast is designed to help you think differently about what could be possible for your life. Now, let’s go live bag. Good morning fellow adventurers. Welcome to today’s show.

So next week, I have a really awesome guest coming on the show, I’m going to tell you who it is only because I want to give you the opportunity to prepare. So you all may have heard of Pam grout. In fact, she was on episode 23 and early episode, she is a Hay House author she’s written, I don’t know, maybe 20 something books. One of my favorites is Think and Grow Rich. But you may have heard of E squared. I’ll get into all of that.

The point is

she’s gonna come in, because she has a new book coming out. So I want to give you the opportunity to grab the book from Amazon before the show airs if you want to. So

back, I guess, I think it was Episode 19. I had a guy on named Mike Lemieux. And Mike came on to talk about A Course in Miracles. Now, of course, in miracles you guys may have heard of that before. But if you haven’t, of course, in miracles we will describe in greater detail on on the episode with Pam next week. But of course in miracles is this really big, thick book, and it’s very dense. There’s two parts to the book. One is a workbook, which is like a daily, you read every day for a year. And then there is a teacher’s manual.

So the idea is that the

book actually takes you at least a year to read because you read one of those pages one of those lessons every single day. So next week when Pam is on, and not to ruin the episode, because there’s so much good, juicy stuff that she talks about. But I wanted to give you the opportunity to grab her book, which is called the Course in Miracles experiment, it’s a bright orange cover.

And it is the daily reinvented so that it is not so dense, so that it’s fun and easy to read and understand. I have started it, I have my copy, I think they begin to ship on Monday. So if you preorder this weekend, you could get it, I think it’ll show up in your mail in your mailbox on Monday. That’s usually how Amazon does it. So the day it’s available, you’ll get it in your mailbox.

So anyway, I wanted to give you guys the opportunity. But here’s where I want to go with the show today. Because really, when it comes down to it A Course in Miracles is about rearranging your beliefs. It’s about rearranging what you believe. Because when you can change what you believe, then your reality changes. And so I want to talk today about beliefs.

And you know,

inside my facebook group, I was asking people, and join us in there, you can find it just go to the art of living, big calm, and I’ll push you right to the Facebook group. But I was asking in there, what is what do you have more of an issue with? Is it more of an issue of actually identifying the belief? Or is it more of an issue of once you have the belief, you’re not sure what to do with it, right, you’re not sure how to shift it or how to change it. And I think a lot of people think like, I’ll do affirmations, and you’ll that’s not that’s a great conditioning tool. But that’s not going to help you in any kind of speed in any way. It’ll take years of you saying I’m worthy, I’m happy, whatever.

So here’s what

I want to do today is I want to talk about beliefs and dive into those a little bit. And I may do a future episode on how to shift those. But absolutely, I’ll be doing some inside the Facebook group. I’m going to come in and talk about that a little bit.

And start to give you guys some some guidance and some ways to start to shift that. Now if you’re at a point where you’re really ready to shift stuff and you want to create a new reality. You’re like, this isn’t the reality that I want, things aren’t going the way I want. And I can’t quite figure out why. Maybe you’ve tried a lot of other things. And you’re ready to get some help and shift you can jump on my calendar.

I do have free breakthrough calls where I’ll help you identify what it is you’re struggling with. Like really what’s at the bottom of it because so many times we just don’t know I have a I have a coach I’m meeting with her today.

Because otherwise I really just don’t know it’s blind to us. It’s blind to us for a reason because that keeps us in our reality. So if that is you and you want some help You can go to my calendar, just go to my website Betsy Pake comm backslash, let’s talk and there’s a calendar there and you’ll be able to just jump on my calendar. Just please, if you make an appointment, don’t stand me up.

That’s all I ask, don’t stand me up, come open, open to learn something new and think about something new. So let’s dive into it though now. All right. So beliefs. Here’s the thing about beliefs, the way that you see your reality right now, the way you experience things, is strictly because of all of the beliefs and values that you have for yourself. So these beliefs, many times are hidden to you. Because they seem like fact, it seems like Well, that’s true, right? Like the sun comes up every day. And that’s true.

And so those seem completely real, completely unbending. And that begins to create the fabric of your reality. And so when we’re born, we don’t have any kind of fabric of our reality, we are really just mushy tape recorders.

And all we do for about the first seven years of our lives, as we absorb all the information around us. So when we are moving through the world, when we are out with our moms shopping, when we’re experiencing, our grandparents, teachers, all of that stuff we are absorbing, and it’s starting to create that framework. It’s like the foundation of how we see the world. Now, why does this happen when we’re zero to seven years old, it’s because of the brainwave state that we’re in.

So as adults, or even as 10 year olds, we’re in a different brainwave state than we are when we’re younger. So when we go into meditation, when we go into hypnosis, as adults, if I were to put you into hypnosis, your brainwave state would lower to a point where you would become very suggestible to anything that I offered you. Now, when you’re zero to seven, you’re in that state all the time.

So you’re constantly walking around, absorbing everything around you. So our brains do something naturally, right? They delete things, they distort things. And they generalize. Our brain does that because there’s so much information around us, right, there’s information coming at us from all over and our conscious mind can only absorb so much. But our subconscious mind is absorbing and noticing things that consciously we just don’t even recognize.

So when we’re zero to seven, we’re walking around the planet, and we’re absorbing all of this. But if we’re still deleting, we’re still generalizing, we’re still distorting, why is it then that most of the beliefs that we get, or experiences the reality that we have comes really from what our parents thought, or our grandparents or our teachers. And that’s because when we’re in that state, the people that are most important, the people that have, I’m going to use the word prestige, so there, they are in charge of you, or you look up to them, or you value their opinion, it weighs more heavily. So your brain says, it’s that it’s more important what that person thinks.

So if you think about if you’re a little kid, and you’re a baby, you’re an infant, right? Or you’re six months old, or you’re one year old, it matters more what your mother is thinking, for you to operate in the world than it does like what your neighbor down the street is thinking, right?

So even if you’re exposed to the neighbor down the street, for you to get the care that you need, it’s better for you to understand the person that cares for you the most, right? So it puts these people almost on a pedestal in terms of the value of what they are providing you and giving you for beliefs. So these core beliefs, these are absolute truths about ourselves, and about our world and about other people.

So these are formed when we’re really young. And these are things that we’ve witnessed other people do, or things that we were told by other people. So any advice that we got or things we were taught. So you know, when we come out, you’ll see like some kids and you’ve seen this on social media, I’m sure, like little kids, they don’t have hate, right? They learn that from the people that they’re around.

And you know, many times when I encounter someone that is filled with a lot of hate, I think to myself, it is their construct of reality of the world, it’s true to them, because that’s what they believed, because that’s what they were taught. Because they had to believe what the person that was caring for them thought so that they could survive, right? So we have all these core beliefs. But here’s the thing, once we become aware, once we become adults, once we become independent,

we have, I believe,

not just the opportunity, but the requirement to look at those beliefs and to see do they support me? Do they support my dreams and goals? And do they serve the world? Right, so if I have hate in me, which I would love to think I don’t, but I’m sure on some level, I’ve been programmed in this society in the United States just as much as anybody else.

And so it is my duty, to unearth what that is, and to move into a place that better supports what I want to see in the world, which is, like happiness and peace and community and togetherness. And we have to do that not only on a grand scale for like our world, in our communities, but we have to do that for ourselves within. So those core beliefs can get really twisted up, when we have like a trauma or something really big happen. You know, if you were rejected by somebody, and then you begin to think of yourself as unworthy. So when you were born, you didn’t think of yourself as unworthy. I mean, think about it, when you’re born,

and you need something, you just cry

until you get it and then you get it. You think the whole world surrounds around you. Because when you cry, and you need something, for, you know, hopefully, you had parents that gave you what you needed, and you got fed or you got changed, or whatever you needed. But then as we start to grow, and we start to have traumas, which I think have traumas, you know, traumas don’t have to be some big, huge, terrible thing that happened to us, we can experience little mini traumas, with rejection or hurt or things that we don’t understand that come up.

And that starts to shift and twist our worldview. So it has to, because we are trying to make sense of things. And our brain is trying to create a reality where that is part of it, where that rejection was part of it. So as we’re experiencing things from zero to seven and beyond, but zero to seven, especially, we’re just simply tape recorders. So we’re creating all of these beliefs, and we’re creating this reality this foundation.


then, we notice that we also have supporting beliefs, and the supporting beliefs are the I think of them as like, they don’t necessarily create my reality, but they support the reality that I think I have. So my real my core belief might be like, nobody would, or I don’t like myself, I’m not worthy. And then a supporting belief is nobody likes me. So I go into an event, or I go into an experience. I go to, I go to school, and I have a belief, maybe you had a trauma, maybe you were, you know, God forbid, you were abused as a child.

And so your core belief is becoming like, I’m not worthy, I’m not lovable, then you go to school, and you begin to your brain, if that’s your core belief, your brain begins to search for support, have that core belief. And so then it sees kids that don’t like you, right, and everybody has kids that don’t like them. But that feels magnified, that seems bigger. And then your supporting belief is, nobody likes me.

See, so I’m not worthy. I’m not lovable. And I have proof now, because I have this experience that nobody likes me. So my core belief is something that is typically like an I am statement, it’s what you really think about you, and who you are in this experience. And then all those supporting beliefs are really the beliefs that show you the evidence, it’s other people, it’s other experiences. It’s other things that are happening. So one of the main and I’m gonna say easiest, but that’s not the right word, simplest ways to shift your reality is to shift your core beliefs.

So imagine if you are an adult, and you have a belief that you’re not lovable, and that you’re not worthy. And then you go on to the internet. And in our world today, you type a comment on something and a ton of people comment behind you. And they say, You’re right. I agree with you. This is right on totally. But then, you know, one or two people say, Are you crazy? You’re not?

That’s not right. How could you think that? Those are the things that your brain is going to pick up on. So you might notice this, you might notice this that you hyper focus on the negative comment, instead of all the positive comments. And we all do this to some extent. But that would be an example of when I have a core belief that’s so strong, I don’t even see the positive,

all I see

is the negative. That’s what I focus on. Because that supports what my core belief is, and then my brain can go Yes, see, because your brain doesn’t know if that’s, like, good or bad. It’s just trying to help you create a construct of the world. So you see the supporting belief, you’re like, exactly, I knew it. Or what about money? Right. So now you go around, you’re like, I can’t get a job that my boss won’t pay me any more money.

I can’t, I don’t, there’s no way for me to make more money. I can’t, I’m always living paycheck to paycheck, whatever it is supporting beliefs. So then, you know, there’s a core belief under there, right. So I know there’s a core belief about money, and I got to get to it. So our role, I believe one of our roles in healing. And in getting what we want in life, having the experiences that we want in life include us shedding the crap, so that our, our vision of the reality of our reality starts to shift. And when that happens, our vibration starts to change, too. And our vibration can go higher and higher and higher.

So every time you shed a layer, or you shed a core belief that is no longer serving you, it releases, you know, I’ve talked before about if we are just corks floating, right. And when you’re floating on top of the water, you can see the shore, you can see all the ocean, you can see the sky, right, you’re floating you can your vantage point is different. But when you have all these layers of crap, it starts pushing your cork down, pushing your cork down, that friend in second grade didn’t like you pushing it down, my parents never let me do stuff, they didn’t think I was worthy Push, push, push, push, push, before you know it, you’re like way down at the bottom of the ocean. And not only can you not see opportunities that may be there that may be available to you.

But you’re also not like connected in, you know, when I think of when we’re floating on the top of the ocean, and we’re that cork bobbing The air is the field, the air is the field and the field is greater consciousness, it is that connection to a higher power source, energy, God, whatever it is. But if you’re pushed, push, push, push, push way down, you can’t make that connection. So that is why I think it is so helpful for people to learn, to quiet themselves to learn to quiet their mind to meditate, to get to a point where the layers are released, and they can flute that cork for a little while.

Even if when they come back the layers of their world and the constructs come back and create something new. But having a mystical magical experience is so important to be able to shift and sort of loosen the reins of what you think. Right. So right now you have a construct, you have a way that you see the world and it is so solid, that you think it’s reality. Right? So the way your version of the world right now, I’m gonna, I’m gonna, I’m gonna guess.

Because we’re all of ours is so different. Like, I look up the street, and I can see like, you know, I know one neighbor there when they were there, I bet they experience reality in a totally different way than I do. It’s not their version is not better or worse than mine. But it’s different, because they’ve had a totally different experience. Which is why you value why you’re so valuable, which is why you matter. Because you have a construct, you have a vision, you have a way of seeing the world that literally nobody else in the whole world has. So it’s important for you to have a voice, it’s important for you to share your stories.

It’s important for you to make connections with the world so that people can start to see a different way. You know, that’s one of the reasons I love connecting with people. And honestly, if specially if they think so differently than I do. I want to understand why, like what happened, right? Where did they get that from? Where did they learn that? And I think that as we move forward in 2020 closer and closer to the presidential election, that can be something that could be really valuable to you. Instead of getting angry or feeling that constriction And I do this too. But instead, I remember at the last,

at the last election, I just tried to be really open as much as I could, it was hard, but to say how do they see the world, what have been their experiences, and if those were my experiences, I would probably feel the same way as them. I did a whole episode on this early on, like around the time of the election last time, why we would think so differently from people that we love, or people that are our friends.

And so having these this awareness about these core beliefs are what’s creating my reality. This is why I think you’ll find A Course in Miracles so interesting in that conversation next week with Pam grout, because it, of course in miracles is all about recreating your reality, shifting that to a place where you’re open and full of possibility. And you can see really how magical you are.

So let’s get into how we can really find a core belief. Okay, so here’s the thing all day long, you’re having thoughts and preferences, and you’re gonna think like, That sounds good. That looks good. It happens probably so fast, you don’t even notice that you’re constantly making choices all day long. And so I mean, notice it just when you got up, like, do I brush my teeth? Or do I pee first? Right?

Do I make coffee? Do I make tea? Do I? What do I have for breakfast? Which way do I walk around the kitchen island, like all of those are happening in your brain in the background, and there is a voting system that’s happening, that is helping you to choose so that it does not have to be a conscious choice, because otherwise you’d be exhausted. So your subconscious mind is in the background.

It’s using all your core beliefs and values. And there is a voting system in there that is deciding which what would what do you do? What do you do? What do you do, and it happens in an instant happens so so fast, you don’t even realize it’s happening. So, to get to a core belief, I want you to just it’s easiest to just start with stuff that’s happening in your life, that’s not what you want, right.

So if it’s if stuff is going your way, then don’t mess with it. But if there’s stuff you don’t want, and you’re like, I don’t like this specific thing, I wish there was more money in my bank account, I wish my relationship was better, I wish I was 10 pounds thinner or 50 pounds thinner, or whatever it is, like whatever it is that you wish, I wish I was traveling more,


So then I want you to notice throughout the day, and you’ll start to notice, because by identifying it, by setting the intention for the day, there’s a part of your brain called the RAS the reticular activating system that will start to alert you because once you tell it, I want to notice how many times I think about how I don’t have money, right? Once you once you tell it that it’s going to start to bring it to your consciousness, it’s going to start to say, Oh, she thought this was important. So let’s bring it to her consciousness.

Otherwise, we’ll just take care of it behind the scenes. But now you’ve told it. And so you’re going to start to notice, this is why in the Facebook group, how we do the possibility posse on Fridays, where I have something for you to find throughout the week. That’s what that is it’s practicing it’s it’s stretching that muscle of that reticular activating system, it’s it’s creating the possibility that you could find what you’re looking for.

And if you could do it with a ladybug, then you can do it with your core beliefs. And you could do it for whatever else it is you want to manifest and have in your life. So let your let your brain know what I’m looking for. Okay, I’m going to work today on this core belief, I know there must be a belief around money and I want to identify it. Now I just want you to know, all the times throughout the day, where you’re thinking about money or you have a feeling about money, right?

If something happens, and you have a feeling, that’s your clue that there’s something happening with your thoughts around it, right, because that’s your brain talking to your body, your body creates the chemical reaction, which is the emotion. So I want you to just notice all the times that this is coming into your awareness. And then I want you to follow the thought. And if you can’t, at this moment, start making notes.

You know, I use the note app on my phone, and I’ll jot down stuff, I’ll jot down if I think I’ve found a belief, right? And then later I’ll follow it to see if that that is a core belief. And how do I follow it? Is I simply asked myself, what does that mean to me? And then I get the answer. And then I say what does that mean to me? And then I get the answer. And then I say what does that mean to me.

And I see if I can follow this deeper and deeper and deeper until I have what appears to be a foundational belief, a core belief. Because once I can get to that and I can be on the foundation, that’s when I can start to shift things when I can start to shift things. That’s when my Reality starts to change, but you can’t shift a thing until you start to an till you start to identify it until you know what it is.

So I feel funky about my bank account, or I’m thinking about my bills next week, or I see someone going on vacation. And I think I wish I could do that. Right? So you have this feeling about money. And you’re like, what does that mean, to me? It means I’m not. I’m making stuff up. I don’t know. But you might say like, it feels like, I’m not. I don’t make enough money.

Well, what does that mean to me? Well, it means I’m not living the life that I want to have what what does that mean, to me? It means I’m not really living to my full potential. What does that mean to me? Well, that means that I’m not doing I’m not enough. Oh, well, what does that? What does that mean? I’m not enough. That’s the core, right? So I can get to that, then I can go, how can I shift that.

So I want you to notice now, I am of the belief that supporting beliefs, that a lot of supporting beliefs are going to lead to a core belief that comes down to your worthiness that comes down to your enoughness. And I think you’ll notice that yours will do that too. And so see how far you can start to drill those down. So this week, become aware, start to notice, start to question your reality, start to question what’s happening around you?

Is this true? Is there another way I could be seeing this? Is there something that I’m not seeing, because of the beliefs that I have? Things are happening all around us, that we are not even consciously aware of?

And what if one of those things is exactly what you need to get to your dreams, and you don’t see it, because you have a core belief that’s standing in the way. So this week, begin to notice begin to drill down. And if you’d like to join us inside the Facebook group, let me know how it’s going. And let’s see if we can start to rock this a little bit and see if we can start to shift your reality in a new way. Because that, I think, is how you live a big life. I’ll see you guys all on Monday.

Thanks so much for listening today. Just a reminder, we’ll see you on Mondays and Thursdays. Now, if you enjoyed this show, I would love it if you shared it with your friends. If you want to take a moment to leave us a review on iTunes. Take a quick screenshot before you hit submit and email it over to us at support at Betsy pake.com. And we will send you a special audio hypnosis to help you overcome a limiting belief. Thanks so much and I’ll see you next week.

Transcribed by https://otter.ai


Meet Betsy!

I'm Betsy Pake!

*Ocean obsessed

*Probably hanging out with my dogs


*Deep thinker

Hey There!

About Betsy

Hi I’m Betsy and I’m a subconscious change expert.
By day you can find me digging deep into the unconscious beliefs and identity of my clients so they can move past self-sabotage and lack of confidence and gain traction in their career and life.