268: Closing Doors to Open Doors - Betsy Pake

268: Closing Doors to Open Doors


Today Betsy talks about releasing smaller things to call in bigger things.


Hi, welcome to the show. If you’re new here, thanks for listening. I know there’s a lot of shows out there. And the last few shows I have not done like an introduction. Like I took the introduction out. I just wanted to dive in. Every time I just wanted to dive in. And I realized when I would listen to other podcasts, I would like Fast Forward past that part. But maybe the first time you listen, it’s important. I don’t know. Hi, I’m Betsy. I’m Betsy Pake. I’m a trainer of NLP and hypnotherapy. I’m a speaker. And most of all, I think I’m an ocean lover and a deep thinker. And I come on here. And I share some of my deep thoughts in hopes that it helps you expand what you think could be possible for your life. So I wasn’t here last week, I’ve missed a couple and I’m going through it, I’m going through it right now. There’s a lot happening and a lot happening that that I’m not going to share on today’s show, because I like to share it once I have the proper perspective on it. But there are pieces, there are pieces of lessons in it. And you know, I always share stories, because I think that our stories are all so similar. And I know this because when I share a story, I get messages from people that go oh my gosh, that. That’s me like that’s it, you know, that’s how that’s helpful for me to see it that way. And so today, I wanted to come in and talk today’s episode, I think will be called fat caterpillars. So I sent out a text this morning. If you’re not on my tax list, it’s free. If you want to text me if you’re in the United States, you can text me, the number is 770-343-3409. Here’s the thing, if you text the word, Oracle, on October 15, we’re going to pick somebody we’re going to do like a roulette wheel. So what it’s called the roulette wheel, like where you spin the Wheel of all the people that have texted the word Oracle and gotten on the text list to win my Oracle cards. So I created these expansion Oracle cards, this isn’t meant to be an ad, I just want to tell you that I have been texting for like a little over a year, I think. Anyway, in all of that. The texts that I sent, we made some really beautiful Oracle cards, there’s this artist that did this, like amazing ocean theme, beautiful, beautiful cards, you can see them on my website, but we’re gonna give some away, if you’re already on my text list, it doesn’t matter, just text me the word Oracle, and it will put you in the like, in the dumper for this for this wheel spinning the roulette wheel, or whatever you call it. So all of that to say, this morning, I sent out a text. And the text said to do bigger things. Sometimes we need to let go of smaller things. Really saying and molting and moving forward. Don’t miss the opening of something new. Because you have so much fear around the closing. I think that a lot of times we make decisions. I know for me, I make decisions based on fear of something that’s going to happen way out in the future or something that could happen or something that is unknown, instead of making a decision for what’s right now. And what we want and how we want to feel, I think. And I know for me that we will go through a lot, we will suffer a lot in the known because the fear of suffering in the unknown seems bigger somehow. So even if where we are isn’t good, we will stay there because it’s known. We’ll stay there because at least we know what we’re dealing with. You know, we’ll stay there because at least I know how to deal with this from a day to day basis. At least I know it’s not gonna at least I know it’s not at least I know it. Right? At least I know it. And if I make a change, or I shift and whether that’s an a job or a relationship or a

hobby or house or like whatever it is. We stay so many times because the fear of what’s out There seems bigger. And, you know, I talked about when I was when I went to the Venetian. A few episodes ago, I talked about this, it was the episode with the title of the waffle fries. And, you know, when I was there, I was thinking, a lot about change, and about what feels comfortable. And about the idea that to really become something new. Because with all change, like we’re constantly growing and changing and becoming somebody different. You know, when you look at your life right now, and you look at who you were a month ago, I bet you know that there are differences. If you look at your life two years ago, gosh, especially like before, COVID. But you’re like, Oh my god, I was so naive. I had no idea what it was like to stay in my house for 24 months, right? So when we, when we look back, we can realize that we’re constantly changing and growing and evolving. And if there’s something in your life right now, that is uncomfortable, you’re still growing, and changing and evolving with that as the impression on you. I’m going to get back to the Phoenician, I got off track. But there’s a reason. If you think about a. If you think about putting out your hand, and I handed you a big ball of playdough. And you squeezed it, and then you released it, your fingerprints would be imprinted on that ball of playdough. There would be dense there. I think that sometimes when we’re in a situation that we don’t like, or that’s uncomfortable, or that we know we need to change, we stay not realizing that that thing is putting an impression on us that’s causing us to change and evolve and grow in a way that maybe we don’t want. We think that just because we’re in a place that’s known, well, at least I know, I don’t want to change. I don’t want to make a different choice, because that feels scary. I don’t know what will happen. There’s a lot of fear. But what’s happening right now is I’m getting imprinted with what’s happening right now. I’m changing because of what’s happening right now. I’m not in a vacuum. Just because I know this pain, doesn’t mean I’m not being impacted and changed and molded by it every single day. And so when we look and we’re like I need to make a change, but out there seems scary. I’m wondering if you really knew I speak for myself if I really knew how this was impacting me now. These decisions, these things that I need to change in my life, that that would seem scary, that would seem scary enough to go, you know what I’ll there feels better. Because I can I can shift and I can grow in a way that I can choose now. If I know that I’m being impacted, I’m staying in this awful I’m in this crappy job, okay, I’m in this terrible job. But I’m staying because at least I know who the jerks are. At least I know where the stressors are. And it’s stressful. And it’s awful, but at least I know. And if I had to go get another job, then that would feel heavy and hard. And I’d have to look, I’d have to figure it out. I might have to be sneaky because I don’t want my boss to find out. And like all of that just seems like a lot. Meanwhile, I’m staying and the hands of this situation are putting their dents into my playdough. And so you get to choose, do I want that? Is this scary enough that I could move forward that I could make a different choice. Now back to the caterpillar idea. When I think about when I was at the Venetian and I was thinking about the things that we’re really good at the things that we know and when you’re I’m going to use the job again but like you’re at this job that you don’t like it doesn’t fulfill you that people that work there, squash you

but you’re really good at it. You can do it inside outside upside down. You don’t have to think about it. You know exactly what to do. And I think about the caterpillar. When I was growing up in Vermont we had I don’t know why we had a lot of these like the big fat Like furry caterpillars, I feel like growing up, that’s like one of the things I really remember about my childhood was watching, we had these white birch trees in our backyard. And the caterpillars at certain times of the year would just be all over those trees. And looking back, I don’t know, maybe they were like eating the tree. Maybe they were killing our trees, I don’t know. But I remember they could walk straight up the tree. And they could go on a branch and be upside down. Like they were so good at it. It, it may have been the thing they were the best at is like being able to walk where nobody else could walk and do the things nobody else could do. But in order to become a butterfly or a moth or whatever they became, I don’t know what those creepy crawly things became. We had a lot of monarch butterflies in Vermont too. So maybe those are the things that became monarch butterflies. But they had to give up the thing they were the best at, which is walking upside down on things and being able to get anywhere straight up a tree. They had to give that up. In order to win, you know the story, are they getting the christless turn to liquid and then become the butterfly. And I know that’s such a cliche, but I think the thing that stood out to me as I was thinking about that, when I was at the finish line was that they had to give up. It’s not that they had to melt and become goo to become something else is that they had to give up what they were the best at what they were really good at so that they could become the next thing. What they were meant to be perhaps. So as I have been going through some hard things. And I have to say I love hard things. Because I know, I’m like, ooh, if everything’s going wrong, then something new is gonna be coming together. And that, to me feels really exciting. And honestly, that’s how I have been viewing the things that I’ve been going through. In fact, I decided as I was going through these hard things that out there the fear of what was out there in the future that I had no control over, because all I have control over is like this second, and this second and this second. And so I decided that that’s all I was gonna focus on. Is this second. How do I feel right now? Good. Okay, keep doing that. How do I feel right now? Good. All right, keep doing that. How do I feel now? Bad? What other decision can I make? What can I do different? What do I need? I have a client that said to me, we were in a group and she said that she asks the universe? What would you have me do next? I might be getting the exact wording wrong. I’m sorry, joy. If I am? What would you have me do next? And when I have been in those moments, where I’m like, Okay, how am I now good? How am I now bad? What would you have me do next? universe. And then I really listen, what would make me feel better? What would make me feel powerful, what would make me feel like I was in control of me in this moment. And then I do that thing. It has been way easier, more profound. And it’s like, it feels like breathing deep. It feels like breathing really deep. And the interesting thing is that I have wanted something to shift in my life for a very long time. I don’t mean to sound like all vague booking, I’ll get into it. But it doesn’t just include me. And so I feel like I need to be to honor that. That is doesn’t just include me. But there’ll be a show, you know, there’ll be a show. So the thing is, is that I’ve wanted something to change for a long, long, long, long, long, long time. And when I just clued into do I feel good? No. What would you have me do next? this good? I’ll do that. Good. Do you feel good? Yep. Do you feel good? Yep. Do you feel good? Nope. What would you have me do next? And then and I’m talking like only in the moment only today. I’m not worried about tomorrow. I’m not worried about next week I had a friend say to me, like how are you doing? And I was like,

I’m great. I feel so steady. I feel powerful. For, I feel like I’m the one making decisions for my life. And that that’s really what I talk about all the time, right. And in so many areas I was but in in one area wasn’t which is probably why I have been able to talk about it, because I had contrast. And so I offer this thought to you today, as we look at making big changes, and doing things that sometimes require us to let go of other things, releasing those things moving forward. And stopping ourselves from missing, missing out on an opportunity to have something new because you have so much fear around something in the future that you have no control over. So fear is coming when we look out way too far. If you bring it in, bring it into just today bring it into just this moment. Am I safe? Yep. Am I good? Yep. But I’m afraid about next week, what if my What if my boss finds out I’m looking for a job? and fires me? Well, is he doing it right? The second or she? Is she doing it? Right? The second? No. Okay, we’ll do what feels good right now and keep moving forward. Because if that moment comes, you thinking about it isn’t gonna help right now. If that moment comes, then you can deal with it. In that moment. You have the skills, you’ll have the awareness, you’ll know what your options are. Right now you don’t know what your options are, if that were to come next week, because you don’t know what next week brings. So I offer you this thought, if there are changes that need to happen in your life, if there are upgrades, if there are things you need to release, so that you can truly start to live in a way that makes you feel alive and thrilled. I have a client in my group that said, I want to wake up every day and feel stoked. I can’t even tell you how many times I’ve thought about that since she said it. Like, do I wake up? That’s actually when I was like, do I wake up and feel stoked? I don’t know that I do. And what would it have to be for me to feel stoked? What would the circumstances need to be? How would I need to be viewing my circumstances? What would I need to change? What would I need to release? What would I need to have? What would I need to call in? And so I offer you the thought of, of releasing the fear that comes when we look too far out. Bring it into this moment. Ask yourself, do I feel good? Yep. And if you don’t, what would you have me do next? Because I think when you start really listening in in the moment, that is when you start to live a big life. So this week, I hope things are amazing. If you want to be a coach if you want to be a better coach and you want to learn NLP hypnotherapy right now. The alchemy Institute is open. We’re enrolling you can just go to my website Betsy Pake calm. It is so great. We have six certifications. I won’t do a whole ad here because no one wants to listen to that. But you can go there and if you have questions, you can just send me a message, happy to talk to you walk you through it. Really, really powerful six certifications to help you know everything you need to know in order to become a really fantastic coach or even to change your own life. So I love you so much. I hope you have an awesome week. Listen and pay attention to yourself. Notice when you feel good and when you feel bad, and I will see you next week. Thanks so much for listening today. If you want to take a moment to leave us a review on iTunes. Take a quick screenshot before you hit submit and email it over to us at support at Betsy Pake calm, and we will send you a special audio hypnosis to help you overcome a limiting belief. Thanks so much and I’ll see you next week.


Meet Betsy!

I'm Betsy Pake!

*Ocean obsessed

*Probably hanging out with my dogs


*Deep thinker

Hey There!

About Betsy

Hi I’m Betsy and I’m a subconscious change expert.
By day you can find me digging deep into the unconscious beliefs and identity of my clients so they can move past self-sabotage and lack of confidence and gain traction in their career and life.