277: Being Fearless with Melba Tellez - Betsy Pake

277: Being Fearless with Melba Tellez

arrowdown-black
Hello
PODCAST

Today on the show I have my friend Melba Tellez where she shares her amazing story…. we dive into ALL the things on this episode!

Melba Tellez helps Latinas rise in their careers and in their lives through resources, community, and coaching. As the founder of Mujeres on the Rise, Melba has helped thousands of women find and land their dream jobs, discover their purpose, and go after the life of their dreams.

After successfully overcoming many obstacles, such as dropping out of high school at the age of 16 to help out her family financially, Melba navigated her way through college alongside a full-time job and went on to get a Master’s Degree in Marketing at one of the best public universities in Texas.

Today Melba is a Product Marketing Manager at Google. Her work with Mujeres on the Rise has been featured in We All Grow Latina, The Mujerista, Thrive Global, Be Fearless Summit, Cafecito Con Estrellita, and many more!

Transcript:

Welcome to the Art of Living big podcast. My name is Betsy pake, and I’m an author, speaker and a master mindset coach focused on helping you understand and design your life with the power of your subconscious. This podcast is designed to help you think differently about what could be possible for your life. Now, let’s go live big.

Hello. Hi, everybody. All right. So I’m really excited today, because I have, I have my friend Mel ball with us. Now. She’s got a really cool story. And she’s really cool. And I just am super excited that we were able to figure out a time where she could come on. So let me tell you about Melba. So I’m not even going to say her last name because you guys know that every single time I have a guest on that I have this problem. I have a problem. Alright, Melba, hey, yes, she helps Latinas rise in their careers and live their lives, through resources, community and coaching. So she’s the founder of mohair is on the rise. And Melba has helped 1000s of women find and land their dream jobs, discover their purpose and go after the life of their dreams. But this wasn’t an easy path. And so I’m excited to have Melba on the show so that we can talk a little bit Welcome. Welcome, Melba.

Hi, Betsy, thank you so much for having me. I am so excited to chat with you. And yeah, I am a fan of your podcast. I was just listening to Caleb’s episode last week, and I am so grateful to be here. Yeah, I’m so glad you’re here. Now, everybody listening, we met, we met in a coaching group, I always say to everybody, I always have a coach, child, coach. Sometimes I have multiple, but that’s how we met. And really, it was a coaching group that was designed to help you get your message out. And when I heard what your your story was, I just thought it was just such a such a triumphant story. And I like those kinds of stories. So can you tell everybody a little bit about you and kind of what your path has been?

Yeah, of course. So currently, for my full time job. I am a product marketing manager at Google. And as you mentioned, I have my own business. I call it my, my nighttime or weekend endeavor. But I am the founder of Mocha is on the rise. And it’s a community that helps Latinas through resources, community and coaching. And what prompted this business idea when I started back in 2019, was really just me identifying a lot of pain points that I faced as a first generation Latina professional. So I, I dropped out of high school when I was 16. In order to get a job and help out my family financially, you know, I was raised in a single parent household. And even though I had all these dreams of going to college and doing something and having a great job, what I realized in my journey is that as quote, unquote, reality kicked in, I started to dream within my limits. And what I mean by that is that

I had all of these ambitions but when I realized that they weren’t exactly possible for somebody like me, or when I turned and tried to find a Latina professional that was doing amazing things in her career, and fell short. I started to think that I could never do something like that. So when my mom lost her job, at the age when I was 16, and my mom, she had me when she was 40. So she was a little bit older, she actually lost her job due to age discrimination in Mexico. And I didn’t I didn’t bed at night, my mom had raised me and my two sisters alone. I just quit school because there is no such thing as free public education in Mexico. So I quit, got myself a job and have been working ever since. And it’s interesting that what actually got me to go back to school was that one day, I was working at a call center at at&t. And I saw for the very first time a Latina professional, commanding an entire room. And interestingly enough, she was actually a marketing. She was a marketing director. And, Betsy, I wish I remembered this woman’s name because I feel like she changed a lot of things for me, without even knowing. But that day, I went home and I’m like, Okay, what do I need to do to become a marketing professional, started doing so much research and said, Okay, if I want to do this, I have to start in, you know, I have to start from the beginning. And that for me meant getting my GED. And so I kept my full time job, got my GED, eventually finished my undergraduate degree and thought, you know, I made it this far, working a full time

job, I think I can keep going, I got this. And so I went to graduate school afterwards. And in graduate school, I like to say that that’s where my second like pivotal moment happened, or my wake up my wake up call. Because when I got to graduate school, I moved to go to graduate school and get again, there was no Latinas anywhere around me, they were, they were hard to find. And this is really disheartening when you’re trying to do something, because

you just feel like it’s not like you’re in the wrong place. And I remember that first semester in grad school. For the longest time, I thought they made a mistake admitting me, I should expect a rejection, like something happened in their system, something went wrong. And this all prompted will hit us on the rise. Because now what I want to do is, I want to highlight the stories of other Latinas and really give Latinas whose trajectory is not, quote unquote, traditional or typical, I want to give them the resources that they need, because the resources that we need as first generation professionals are first and Latinas are quite different, because there is a lot of mindset work that needs to happen when you’re the only person in the room. So this is so there’s so many things that I want to ask you about, like what an amazing, incredible mindset that you must have had in order to keep pushing through. But I think that one, you know, the thing that sounded like was the thing that made you go, Oh, wait a second, was representation was being able to see somebody that was powerful and commanding the room and was doing the things you wanted to do that that looked like you, right?

That’s exactly it. Honestly. It didn’t feel like it at the time. But now like reflecting on my journey, yeah, it’s always been community, it’s always been Danity, it’s that representation and having someone that you can look up to as as a source of truth. Because sometimes in our immediate surroundings, we may not see people doing what we want to do or thriving in the ways that we want to thrive. But that’s that’s actually a side note. That’s why I love you know, social media so much, because now we have this incredible reach, and we can find people that are truly inspiring, and get that help that we need. And, you know,

God’s gonna say, I think, no, I think that, um, I do think social media really changed the game because it it, it opened up where it wasn’t just like corporations deciding who got to be seen. It was people deciding who got to be seen, right. And I think YouTube sort of started that with changing who we looked at and who we followed and who was influential in those ways. And I think that was a huge, huge shift. I want to go back if I might go all the way back. So you’re living in Mexico when all of this begins, right? Where you leave school and your mom was our job and all of that. When did you decide to move to the United States?

That’s a great question. So I moved back to the United States. I was born in Texas in a small little town called Andrus, Texas. And my mom always said that she had her heart split into because she was of course from Mexico. And we always spent, I spent my entire childhood traveling back and forth between the two. But the moment that I decided to go back to to Texas was when I was I was about to turn 19 I believe. And I decided to go back because there was a lot of violence and a lot of crimes happening in Mexico at the time. And you you may have seen it on the news, it was all over the place a lot of gang violence and, you know, terrorism and things of that nature. So we just didn’t want, you know, to risk stain and something to happen to our family. So we ended up going back to Texas. And luckily, of course, you know, I grew up most of my childhood in San Antonio, I spoke English, I never had to like learn the language or anything. So I found in a job almost immediately after heading back to Texas. Okay, so that’s when you went back to Texas. And then when did you get your GED? Like how long after all of that? Did you say I’m going to get my GED?

I want to say it was about a year and a half or two years later, because I had a you had a very 20s

Yeah, I was about early 20s.

Which is amazing, right? Because

I mean, I don’t want to skip over that. The reason why I’m saying that the reason why everybody listening why I’m pausing to that is because you know one of the things that I teach is really about our unconscious patterns right?

about how we just it is it is pretty rare, where we’re able to stop a pattern or a path and completely shift in your shift wasn’t just like, well, I’m 18 and just got out of just left high school. I mean, it was several years and a different country. And then you’re like, I’m going to make this change, I’m going to do this thing. And there’s a lot of fear around that. And our brains are designed to keep us doing the same thing over and over. I mean, if you feel stuck, it’s because your brains working really well. Right? Like, don’t move out of the comfort zone. And so you were able to do that. So I’m curious at that time. Was there somebody that you saw do that? Or was there some thought? Like, what was the what was happening in your head that made you go I can I, this is not the path for me.

Yeah, that’s a that’s a really good, good question. So there was honestly like two pivotal moments, right. We talked about the woman who was so inspirational, and I saw leading a room and that was definitely Part A big part of the story. Yeah, another big piece that really if you mind united, tick tock, you. If you made it, tick tock, you could find her.

I like that. Yeah, I feel like the second part of that was definitely my now husband we have been dating for, you know, ever since I was like 1617. And he and I both moved back to Texas at the same time. And I don’t really talk about this a lot, because it’s not really my story to tell. But in I want to say it was 2012, his grandmother passed away. And this was before I started going back to do my GED. And when his grandmother passed away, who had basically, you know, contributed so much to his, to his growth into his, you know, childhood, that was a really huge wake up call for him. And as a result in me as well, because his grandmother always told him, like, you need to go to school, you need to do these things. There’s so much sacrifice happening, when families are moving to different countries to better, you know, the situation for their families. And

because of that, he like it lit up in a fire in me, I always say that it lit up a fire in him that as a result lit me up as well. And there was this desire to fulfill that dream for her and to just make her proud, just make her proud. And having somebody that was going through the same things that I was granted, his story is a little different than mine. He had a high school degree he had finished. But we each had our own obstacles that we were having to overcome as first gen. Professionals and having someone to leverage and go through that process with was really, really important. Because granted, neither one of us knew what we were doing, right. You know, when when, typically when people are going through the college experience applying for for loans or having to navigate which college to go to, like they have their parents or they have someone in their family to leverage. We didn’t have that because we were the first in our families doing that. So even though neither of us knew what we were doing, we had each other, you know, and we were confused together. Right. But yeah, they’re together really made the difference. Totally. And I have to think that him having his high school diploma, probably did have an influence because we, who we hang around with the most is the people that have the impression on us, right? I will say we’re like Plato, and the five people or those five fingers that are grabbing your Plato are the things that are going to leave an imprint. And, and so it’s really cool, because you did have him as like, Okay, you guys were traveling along the same path, but he was kind of like one little notch forward, right? Where you could, where you could kind of hold on to it and be like, That’s what I want. That’s how I want to feel right and keep moving. Keep moving together.

Yeah, definitely, like just having somebody to even talk to or rent to or just be on the same journey with it really did it. It helped a lot. And we talked about that all the time. Like we wouldn’t be where we are now if it weren’t for each other. And the fact that we’ve grown because when we got together, Betsy, like we had absolutely nothing. We moved in together. We were sleeping on the floor for about two months, because we didn’t even have a bed. And now he’s a software engineer at Google. I do Product Marketing and Management at Google and I have my own business and it’s so incredible to think back on that because if I think to when we first met I never would have thought that

Where I am now. And granted, I have so much to learn and, you know, growth, still, but I never would have thought that I’d be even where I am right now, at this point in my life. What do you think is like the biggest mindset shift? Like, if you were to teleport back to talk to a 20 year old you? What would you say are the biggest? The biggest mindset shifts that you’ve had? So what you know, like, what would you say? Would you say like, you know, 20 year old me, this is what you need to adopt, this is what you need to believe in order to get to this place.

I think the first thing I would tell myself is that I am worried that, and I see this a lot now with my coaching clients as well is I talk to people about, you know, talk to me about what career you want, where do you want to work, because I don’t just tell people that want to break into tech, I help people across a variety of industries. But what I usually find is that people are afraid to even state what they want. Because again, they’re trying to dream within their limits. They don’t want to say I’m going after Google, or I’m going after a job in you know, at Amazon or Facebook, because it seems scary and an out of reach. And so the first thing that you need to do, from a mindset mindset perspective is know that you are worthy of it, just because there is no free presentation, or because no one in your family or your immediate network is in a place like that, it does not mean that it’s not possible for you. And it does not mean that that you are not worthy of having what you want. On the contrary, like you putting yourself out there and going after those, those tough dreams of yours or those challenges, really will not only help you, but it’s gonna inspire other people. And at the end of the day, it’s all a ripple effect, right? If we can inspire one person, and that person can inspire somebody else. That’s how we make real change happen. And that’s why I love podcasts like yours that really give the opportunity for people to share their stories, and also to dive into what exactly is needed to make that shift and to decide, I am not okay with what I have right now this is I’m not going to just be content with what I have. I want more, and it’s okay to want more. It doesn’t make you a selfish person to want more, or to want better for yourself or for your family. Yeah, I love, love, love that. And, you know, I think that it’s

it’s so important for us to share our stories. And when I know you and I were like in a small group, we were in our coach group. And then we got put into like a little room on Zoom, you know, breakout room, and you started talking and I was like, Oh, my God, I was I have to talk to you, I need you on the show. And you know, I believe and I know from the work that I do, that our unconscious minds don’t know the difference between whoever’s listening, your unconscious mind doesn’t know the difference between you, and Melba. So the things that you are saying, start to churn inside people connect to your story, it becomes part of their story. And so as you’re giving these tips, I love this because it’s it truly is starting to impact and change people just by listening. So getting that worthy piece. I think that that’s something that is just so universal. And I think most of the decisions that we make are coming from this place I owe somebody who come to me this week I talked to somebody wanted to lose weight. I talked to somebody else that wanted to have a better relationship with their mom, I talked to somebody else that wanted to have a better there was there there Why can’t I think husband I’m like why can’t I think partner I wanted to say partner but it was for her husband. But all of those things in the end if you feel like you’re worthy. Like if you feel like you’re worthy you make totally different decisions. You act totally different. Right? So I love that one was there is there anything else like the the you now I almost said the old you but you’re were

you talking to the 20 year old you what would be one of the other things that you would say you have to have to get there.

What would be an internal resources you’d have to have?

And I don’t mean to put you on sparks. I know I told you no, no, just come in. We’ll talk. It’ll be a no I love this. I love this because it generates like really organic responses. And

I would have to say like just courage. I feel like everybody feels fear, right? Like fear is totally normal. And instead of accepting the fact that fear is normal, what we try to do oftentimes is shy away from it and we we go to the other direction to our comfort zone where we feel comfortable and confident. And the reality is

That being afraid is okay. You shouldn’t run away from fear you should read directly towards it. Because if you’re running towards fear, then that means that you’re growing, you’re stepping out of your comfort zone, you’re going to learn new things about yourself, but also about what you want in life, there’s absolutely no way for you to learn what you truly want in life out of your career relationships, or whatever the case may be. Unless you’re out there actually actively trying and, you know, experimenting with different things. And you can experiment in your comfort zone, because it’s your comfort zone, you’ve been there, you’ve done that, where you experiment is outside of that. It’s, it’s from a place of fear. So what I say is, it’s okay to be afraid, be afraid, but have the courage to continue in that direction, because that’s how you’re going to make it through. And I can tell you so many different times where I was afraid, I was afraid when I was getting my GED, I was afraid when I took Algebra, because I am terrible at math, I’m still afraid every single day when I’m making a new decision for my business or launching a new product at work.

Being afraid is okay. Because every single time that I have been afraid, I have made it through that stronger even if I didn’t succeed, even if I failed, I made it through stronger, and I made it through with more knowledge than I had when I started. And that knowledge that foundational knowledge is really important, because then you’re able to take on bigger challenges as you go. How do you know when it’s fear? So, like, I’ll tell you, for me, fear shows up for me as confusion. I get like super confused where I don’t know what to do next. Right where I’m like, I don’t know, I don’t know, there’s so many parts. But that’s really fear showing up is confusion. Does it show up for you just as a feeling? Or is it something kind of weird, like mine?

I actually I love that you share that. For me. Fear comes up?

When I am stagnant. When I am afraid I usually don’t do anything. I am just looking.

Yes, exactly. I’m looking at these things that I want to do. And what I noticed is that I tend to go back and forth. Like let’s say I have three or five goals that I’m trying to achieve. I’ll keep on going back and forth between which one I want to prioritize. And it’s not really, because I’m trying to figure out which one to prioritize. It’s me making an excuse to delay my action. And that’s the thing, like you can have all of these goals, you can plan all you want. But if you’re not taking action towards these goals, you’re going to be in the exact same place a year from now. Yeah, yeah, you know, one of the things because I love planning, I love like mapping out all my goals. And then I get confused because the map is so big that I’m like.

And I do an exercise. And I’ve talked about this on the show million times, but it’s bananas how good it is. And I have this little worksheet that I use. But I basically the basic rundown of it is I set a timer for 10 minutes. And then I take the one task and I try and figure out how to break it down into as many tiny pieces as I can. So like the goal, like, here’s where I am, here’s where I want to go, what are the millions of little things I could do that would get me there. And if I can make the task, like so small that it only takes like five minutes, then it starts me moving. You know, I remember years ago, my daughter, um, I I have to make dinner every night. I was like, what? Why is this my job? You don’t? Why does everybody have to eat every freaking night? For one thing? I was like ketchup packets for everybody. I can’t do this. And it really was overwhelming because I had so many other things. I think as moms and women we like we find that happens where it’s there’s too much. And I remember thinking, I know there’s recipes on Pinterest. And but I literally couldn’t pull it together to like to figure out the recipes, get the list, go to the grocery store, like all that I couldn’t do and so I broke it down and like one day I remember all I did was put the Pinterest board together I didn’t even add anything to it. Like that’s how tiny I went. And that helped because it just got me into action. So I always say like the the antidote to fear antidote to fear is just action. Right? However it shows up for you just taking those actions. So it sounds like that’s like really what your thing is, is like, come on fear. I see you but I’m just gonna keep doing it anyhow.

Yeah, that’s honestly that’s exactly what it is. And the more we delay things, the more they build up in our minds and we make them out to be bigger than they need to. So I love this concept of breaking it up into small digestible pieces.

is that you can tackle one by one. And little by little you’ll you’ll get there. But even if it’s a small step, it’s still a step closer than you were yesterday. Yeah, yeah. All right. So you get the GED, you feel the fear, you keep moving forward fears showing up and you don’t care. Or you do. You, you’re like, I care, but I’m going to do it anyhow. And then what’s like the thing that makes you go, I’m not going to just

get a job at a as a tech, like, what me? Like Google is like, that’s a big deal. How did you get to where like that? What were the steps? Like, what were the stepping stones in that process? And to even dream of that?

Yeah, I

honestly, I, so this is what happened. I was in grad school still. And we had tours lined up at several different companies. And as I was touring these companies, I again, realize there’s not a lot of Latina representation here. And instead of saying, there’s not a lot of representation, I don’t want to work here. I said, I want to work here, because I want to be here when things change. And like, I want to be the representation. Yes, I want to be here, the moment I see that shift, right, I want to be part of the shift, and I want to see things get better. And, and this is not specific at all to tech, like there’s so many industries that lack representation, right. But I saw it, and I thought, I can do this. I didn’t know how I have absolutely no idea. But I thought I’m gonna do it. And so what I started to do is I started to apply to all these jobs. And I kept getting rejection after rejection after rejection. And I finally I was about to graduate from grad school, and I had an interview lined up at Facebook, and tech interviews. For those of you that may not know, it’s, it’s a really drawn out process. Usually you have anywhere from six to eight interviews. And it’s intense. And so with Facebook, I made it all the way to the last one, and I got rejected. And that crushed my soul. Because I had invested so much time in preparing I prepared like it was nobody’s business, I prepared more than I did for the GRE when I was trying to get into grad school, and it was insane. The worst part is, I think, that I actually felt like I had done really, really well. And that’s where I feel like I was absolutely crushed that I failed. And that prompted me to start researching so much I met with career coaches, I met with recruiters, I started networking. And the more I realized people and I gathered all this intel, I was like, Okay, I feel like I know what I need to do now. And I started compiling again, using that community, that community is so important we are at least I have this

terrible habit of trying to do everything on my own. But once I started leveraging people and figuring out what were those action steps, I was able to compile all of that and come up with an action plan. And so I ended up applying to a job at Amazon. I honestly feel like when I applied, I thought it was a really long shot that I would even get called, got called ended up getting the job. I worked at Amazon for two years prior to working at Google. And then once I decided I was ready for something new at Amazon, I started looking for new jobs. I had multiple competing job offers at top tech companies. And I ended up going with Google. But all this to say that I learned a lot by one doing

by failing a lot. And to by leveraging my community and leveraging people who have been there and have done similar things. Because that really gave me the confidence to put myself out there again after having failed miserably. And it really just let me know that it’s okay to fail like, no have receiving a no right now. Does that mean? No forever. It’s just not right now. Try again. And adopting that idea really did help as well.

Yeah, you know, community, right? Because it’s the it’s the fingers that touched your playdough. So being in that, like space, I want to ask you about failure.

Because

how you how you handle failure or how you see failure or the story that you have around failure, I think is really, really important.

So I’m curious, because obviously failure to you doesn’t have the same story.

worry that it may have with other people who stop when they fail. So tell me what you think about failure and what your story is around that.

My my thought about failure is that

you really

have to just accept the fact that failure is part of the process. And in failing, you are learning. And granted, I say this now, but I want people to know that that was not always the case, I struggled so much with failure as I was, you know, navigating my career, and, you know, even academia at that. But when I got when I got rejected from Facebook, I’m gonna use this example. Because, again, I practiced so hard, I did everything that you’re supposed to do. And I still failed. And I think, as business owners, or as you know, even in our careers, in relationships, too,

we have this idea of what you’re supposed to do, and we see people doing it, we may hear people talk about it. And we’re like, Okay, I’m going to make my list. I’m going to make my list, whether it’s physical or mental. I’m going to make my list of all the things that I have to do.

And wow, is it heartbreaking when you follow everything on that list, and you still fail? And I failed, and I didn’t just wake up the next day, like, Okay, I’m ready to apply for jobs again? Absolutely not. I was heartbroken for six months. I talk about career heartbreak all the time. Because yes, it’s very much thing. I was career heartbroken. I thought I was going to graduate with my masters. And I was going to have all these jobs lined up and people were going to be coming to me left and right. Wow, was I clueless, I had no idea like that, that just does not happen, right. And so I gave my myself time to grieve, and I talk about this all the time, like, don’t feel the need to just go out there. And, you know, try all over again the next day. Because at that point, you’re just like the problem, your heartbreak is still very much there, you’re still wounded. And you can’t go out there the very next day, being wounded and trying to do it all over again, because it’s not going to be you’re not going to have the same result, right? You still need to heal that that heartbreak first before you can put yourself out there. And so I took six months for six months, I did not apply to a single role. I found myself a contractor job, I was working that contractor job, I’m like, Okay, I’m going to gain experience, gonna learn what I have to do.

This is for now, this is not forever.

And go ahead. I know we’re both I’d like

you can see me so she can see me, you guys. So I’m like, Okay, so here’s a question. I want to, I want you to keep going. And I’m sorry if I took you off track. But oh, no, that’s fine. So the you’re now talking to 20 year old you and saying you’re going to have this huge rejection from Facebook, it’s going to be a lot of interviews, you’re going to put your whole heart and soul into it. And they’re still gonna say no, but you’re gonna learn how to

what is it? What did it what did you learn how to do? Like, what’s the what’s the resource that you now have? What did you gain from that? What’s the gift in that? That then you could take forward with you?

Does that make sense? If we want to? Yeah, that does. If we want to talk like a very, like tangible tip. It was really to

communicate the value in them hiring me. So a lot of times we approached jobs, and we’re talking about, you know what we want, like, oh, I want this in my next job. I want this in my next role. I’m really interested in this, this and this. And instead, how we should be approaching these interviews is talking about this is how I can help you. This is why you need a Yeah, we don’t talk about our wants, we talk about theirs. Did you have the thing that they would need, though, before you went through that and changed from that experience of rejection? Does that make sense? What I’m saying because we go through something that’s painful and a struggle and all of that, that’s when we grow that’s when we start collecting I always think like I’m carrying around this bucket, and all the times that things are shitty, I’m if I don’t avoid it, if I grow through it, then I have these things I can put in my bucket. And then when I get to the next place, the next Facebook interview, you know, whatever it is, then I have this thing do you have what is the thing like did it just give you the confidence to say I didn’t die? Do you know what I mean? Like I went through everything and I didn’t die like I’m it’s gonna be okay. Obviously, yes. Yeah, I think that’s what it is. It was the realization that you know,

Life is not over. Like sometimes we face like these big Shetty things that happen to us and you we think our lives are over. Like, that’s how I felt at the time. I thought, wow, like my, my career’s over. Like, I have no career, I just went to grad school, got a $35,000 loan for nothing. That’s how I felt. But what I learned is that, you know, it’s, it’s never for nothing like it. And I and I will say this again. But

whatever situation you are in now, it doesn’t have to be forever. But in order for it not to be forever, you have to keep going. And that was the real shift in me that you had to get going. Yeah. Ah, yeah, that’s good. Yes, yes. So even when things don’t go the way you want, take a minute rest, heal your little heartbreak and then good, then keep going to it all over again. Yeah. Because in the end, the goal is still there. Like, yeah, you might have tripped along the way or the path didn’t look the way you expected it to. But the goal is still there. You know, I told the story. I this summer, in August, I went to Scottsdale, Arizona, to the Phoenician Have you ever been there? No, I’ve never been there. It’s like a resort. It’s magical. I went by myself for like, you know, four days to meditate, whatever, as I’m sitting there one day by the pool, because that’s what that’s where you meditate, you know,

the cocktail. This little kid was running. He was maybe like three, and he starts running towards the kiddie pool. And I see his mother looking at him. I see him running. I know he’s gonna fall. And he takes like a huge digger. But the angle I was at, I could see him that his eyes never left like the mushroom fountain thing he’s stuck in. So he just got back up, even though I’m sure he was stinging.

But he fell, but he kept looking where he wanted to go. And then he just got back up and kept going. And I thought, like, that’s how you feel when you don’t have a ton of baggage. When you don’t have a bunch of story. You just go oh, well, I tripped. But I still want the thing. And I can still see things. So I’m just gonna keep going. When we have a bunch of stories, then we go on. My mother told me I was going to trip if I was running, like, Oh, I didn’t listen to the rules like, oh, you know what I mean? If only I could read I would have known I wasn’t supposed to run like, baggage. Right? Exactly. And wow, like, Thank you for sharing that. Because that goes back to

a lot of the work that I do. Or a lot of the things that I talked about when I say dreaming within your limits, when you’re young, you don’t have any limits, you don’t know no limits the limits, you know, you start adopting them and learning them as you grow. And again, reality kicks in. But when you’re when you’re young, you have no concept of that. So you just go forward and you keep going and you keep going you fall you get back up and it’s no big deal. Like you might cry for a second. And you might you know, ask somebody to comfort you. But then you’re right back on that thing. And you’re doing what you’re not supposed to be doing. And

you’re

not supposed to be walking. I guess I

don’t get to walk. Yeah. So yeah, so that’s so when I when I do speaking engagements, that’s what I talk about, I talk about what can we do to start dreaming outside of our limits? What can we do to go back to how we used to dream about things, instead of trying to convince ourselves that where we are now is actually where we want to be? Because sometimes where we are now is not actually what where we want to be what we tell ourselves and we try to convince ourselves that it is because otherwise, that means that you’re going to have to face failure. That means that you’re gonna have to be afraid and do the thing. And it’s easier to tell yourself, I’m actually okay with what I have. Or I’m actually okay, right where I am. That’s not necessarily true all the time. So we really need to do that work and say, Okay, what can I do to start dreaming like a kid again? Yeah, I love it. I love it. So tell me now. Now you have Mohair is on the rise, and you help specifically Latina women or any women or tell me about what you do and how people can find you. Yeah, of course. So I help any women. I’ve also helped men, but the difference is that I mark it specifically for Latina women just because I feel like there’s a gap but there’s a gap and we need additional resources and you walk the walk so yeah, so Exactly. Hands on there. Playdough Yes, I love it. Yeah. So you can find me on makitas on the rise on Instagram. I am also on Tik Tok. If you are a business owner and you’re not on Tik Tok, please

Do yourself a favor and go on tick tock because I grew to about 35,000 followers in two months. So business owners, that’s so good sleep on it. I love them. I love the tick tock. I call it the clickety clack, my daughter because she thinks I’m so old. So I’ve been here I love click clack. I saw it on click clack.

Please do a video on that woman that inspired you. Because who knows? I feel like you might find her. And that could just be really fun.

I will definitely do that. Betsy. I’ll send it to you what I do that? I know. You need to you need to? Yes. Okay, so they can find you on the clickety clack. They can find you on Instagram. If they want to work with you. They can find you on Instagram. And it links to your website. And I’ll have all the details in the show notes. Right? Correct. Correct.

Awesome. Awesome. So thank you so much. Thank you so much for being here. This was so fun to get to talk to you and to get to know you better, and to get to pick your brain a little bit about all the things I really really loved it.

Of course. Thank you for having me, Betsy.

Thanks so much for listening today. If you want to take a moment to leave us a review on iTunes. Take a quick screenshot before you hit submit and email it over to us at support at Betsy pake calm, and we will send you a special audio hypnosis to help you overcome a limiting belief. Thanks so much and I’ll see you next week.

HI, I'M YOUR HOST

Meet Betsy!

I'm Betsy Pake!

*Ocean obsessed

*Probably hanging out with my dogs

*Optimist

*Deep thinker

Hey There!

About Betsy

Hi I’m Betsy and I’m a subconscious change expert.
By day you can find me digging deep into the unconscious beliefs and identity of my clients so they can move past self-sabotage and lack of confidence and gain traction in their career and life.

Join The
Alchemy Collective

A monthly membership to help you create deep change that lasts.