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I have been recovering from surgery this past week and, just like a long car ride, recovery gives you a long time to think.
Over the past few months, life has had it’s struggles and my focus has been on not getting stuck. Even if I’m moving forward slow, I know that any movement is good movement. It got me thinking about a quote that Amelia Earhart had on the side of her plane; “always think with your stick forward”.
Keep moving, even when you are trying to figure things out, that way you keep momentum and don’t crash.
This week I want to share six ways you can “think with your stick forward” so that you don’t get stuck, even in the hard times and are able to use the slow down to your advantage so you keep feeling positive movement.
Welcome to the Art of Living big podcast. My name is Betsy pake. I’m an author, a speaker and a trainer of NLP and hypnotherapy. And I’m focused on helping you understand and design your life with the power of the subconscious. This podcast is designed to help you think differently about what could be possible for your life. Now, let’s go live big
hello, hello fellow adventurers. I think this is going to be I think this is going to be a short little episode because I don’t want to drive you crazy with my nose. Can you hear my nose?
I had surgery last week. So I want to give you a couple quick updates. I’ve got stuff to tell you. And I want to be able to tell you and I don’t want to make you listen to me for too long. So let me give you I’m gonna give you the rundown. It’ll be like a speed. It’d be like speed time together. Okay. So if you’re new here, hi. I’m happy that you’re here. This is a fun place to be get to know the other people that listen to this show. If you want your life to be better, I don’t know. I have the best listeners ever. Okay, so last week, I had surgery on my nose. You guys probably have heard me talk about this. If you’ve listened to the earlier episodes, it’s not my sinuses. It’s actually my nose. And let me just say 1000 times harder than I thought it was going to be. I don’t know what I thought. But I didn’t expect what I got.
I mean, my whole face was so swollen. I looked like a cartoon dog. I just like a pug, cartoon pug. I mean, my phone didn’t recognize me, my dog didn’t recognize me. He was so confused because I think I smelled like me. And I sounded like me, but like my face did not look like me. And it has been a full week now. And I am just barely getting back to where I’m like anything like myself. They packed my nose with actually tubes. So I had tubes in my nose.
Then they just took those out yesterday. So I really think that’s the turning point where I’m starting to feel a little bit more like myself, but I still can’t, I still can’t like blow my nose. I’m not allowed to blow my nose. I had a thickening of my septum so like a deviated septum. So they had to shave my septum down, basically and a few other things. So I can’t blow my nose because they don’t want me to like blow out whatever they did. But they also want me to neti pot. So if you’ve ever neti potted, but then not been able to blow the water out of your nose, you just understand the crazy making place where I am right now. So anyway, I survived my husband was a champ. Next Level champ, we both were shocked at the length of time it took me to recover and he was great. So that’s awesome. Also, I want to tell you that every Thursday, I am sending out three, an email with three things that I’m excited about. So and I let you know about the podcasts. But if you’re a regular listener, you already get the podcasts. But if you want to know the three things that I’m excited about every week, make sure that you go to my website and just you can sign up. If you go to Betsy pake.com/live Big, there’s a ton of free stuff. Anything you sign up for, we’ll get you on the list that gets you the three things I’m excited about. But there’s also like a little link right in the top that says if you want that email, click here, and just sign up. So my things for tomorrow or for today, Thursday, they’re really good. So if you’re not on the list, and you join the list, the email will have already gone out but it’s okay. Because you’ll get an email from me automatically just hit reply. And I will forward you the email from today with the three things I’m telling you there are good things this time, like things that you’re gonna go oh my god, this changed my life. And I kind of wanted to tell you on the show. But I’m, I’m trying to I’m trying to get I’m trying to build my email list, you know, because I want to be able to communicate with you guys over there too. So anyway, head over there, Betsy pake.com/live Big get on that list. Get the top three things I’m into. Hopefully every week there’ll be amazing so alright.
Oh, I do have a funny little thing that you guys might like. So you know, my friend Trish from Episode Two away, and then I think she was on like 313 too.
And if you haven’t listened to those episodes, it’s worth your time. Those are fun episodes. If you like the if you’re on the little bit of the outskirts of the Whoo, you will like those.
But Trish, you know, I talk I go through fits and spurts you know like you do with your friends, where you’ll talk to them like a lot
or you’re just texting or you know, whatever. So, sometimes if we are really busy, we don’t keep up like we normally do. Anyway, I told her I was having a surgery. I may or may not have told her when probably when I talked to her I didn’t know when, because they just booked it a few weeks ago.
So I, you know, we’ve just both been really busy. And then I had my surgery. I went in, like, at like noon time, one o’clock. And then that night, I got a message from her. And she’s like, Hey, are you okay? Like, I forget how she worded it. But she was like, you went like off the radar today. Like, what happened? Are you okay? You got real, you went, you feel really low. I think that’s what she said. I was like, yeah, it was under anesthesia, I probably was off the radar. Like I was checked off, like I wasn’t on the grid. But I thought it was so funny that she just felt that you know, and I kind of loved that. And I felt you guys might like that, too. So anyway, Trish knew when I was off the grid. All right. So this, like I said, has been way harder. So hard, in fact that I have come up with a whole series of things that I’m going to be teaching this month inside the collective. So if you’re in the collective, we are working on getting a rock solid mindset for the month of April. So if you’re not in there, just go to my website and join us. But I’ve got some really great things to share. But one of the things that I’ve been thinking about that I wanted to talk to you today about on the podcast was,
you know, when you lay in bed, trying to recover, you have a lot of time to like, think about things. And I kept thinking about this quote that I saw years ago, and I’ve probably mentioned it on the show before, but it’s an Amelia Earhart quote, she actually had it written on the side of her plane. And it said, always think with your stick forward.
Always think with your stick forward. So if you’re flying a plane, and you’re pushing the stick forward, you’re in action, you’re going right, you’re moving forward. And so always think while you’re in action, don’t stop to evaluate or rehash without some sort of movement, I want to explain what I mean. Because I have been thinking this as I’m like laying there, and I’m like, I am stopped. I have a lot of big goals and things that I’m trying to do. But I’m stopped, right. And if I always have to think with my stick forward, what can I be doing so that I’m actually maintaining speed, right? You have to maintain speed so that you don’t crash. And I don’t want to crash. And there is a thing that happens in everybody’s life, whether they’re sick, like I was, you know, or recovering or whatever, or just in life because it gets really hard. Life has moments and times where it gets really hard. And when those things happen, we can start to constrict. And when we start to constrict, we slow down, it’s really, really normal. And it’s a way to protect ourselves and almost to ground, I think in to feel some sort of control or stability. And in my life, I have found that if I am moving forward, I won’t get stuck, even if I am moving forward very slowly. So I’m going to, I’m going to I’ve got like five or six thoughts that I want to share with you. And I want to tell you sort of what that looks like for me. Okay, now I’m recovering right from this nose thing. I really couldn’t do anything. But all I did was I put a pad of paper next to my bed with a pen.
And I and I didn’t expect to get any break great ideas. I didn’t expect to work, I really allowed myself to rest. But I said, unconscious mind if there’s anything you want me to know, bring it to my attention. And I’ll just write it down. And that way I can deal with it when I’m done when I’m done healing. And so things would come to mind, oh, I have to do that. Or I need to do that. And all I would do was write it down, write it down, write it down. It was my way of continuing to move forward instead of getting stuck and ruminating on something. Now I have a list right? So I was making the list and that was my action. So, so many times I think when something goes wrong or something is really hard.
Our first reaction is to just freeze, right? Freeze, or fawn, right, or fight. So if we freeze it’s when we start getting this feeling that we’re feeling stuck and it can be really hard to know what to do once we’re stuck. It can be harder to actually get going than if we just moved
A little bit all along the way. So here are some thoughts that I had, when I was laying in bed.
If you start to feel like life is hard, and I’m starting to feel stuck, I can tell I’m starting to stop. Here’s a number one thing is, I want you to get really clear on what you want. And, you know,
you may have heard me say this before, and you may already be like, I know what I want. But I want to make sure that it’s really what you want. And I want you to say it like in a sentence, like, what do you want. And this is where sometimes you will start to notice that you’re not really very clear or concise about what it is you want. Well, I want things to feel happier, I want things to be better, I want my relationship to be easier. I want what do you want? Because that isn’t anything. I get it. That’s the thing, but that’s not anything. Right? What is it that you want, I want to have better communication. I want to feel like I’m heard, right? I want to have 20 new clients inside the alchemy institute this month, like I want to have get clear and concise. And then ask yourself does that thing does that answer the question of how will I know? Like, how will you know when you have it? Because if you are saying like I want a better relationship? Well, how will you know? We’ll know because we have really good communication. Okay, great, then what you want is to have really great communication. So ask yourself, what is it that you want, and get clear on how you’ll know that’s going to help you define it? Okay. Now, the second thing is, sometimes we can get an idea of what we want, or get a lot of clarity around what we want. But then that is a huge leap. I’m going to use the example that I just used of like, I want 20 people inside the alchemy Institute, which is my program where I train people to learn NLP, I just think it’s so important. I just think everybody should know it. Honestly, I think everybody should know it. I think it is. I think it should be taught in schools, I think everyone should have this information and this knowledge, and that it will change their life, and it will change their kids lives if people knew it if adults knew it. So. So I think it’s super important. So what is the steps that I’d have to do to make 20 people join the group in that particular month, right, like, that’s a big leap to be like, I’m at standing at zero when I want 20. So, on my website, if you go to my website, and you go to Betsy pake.com/live, big, there’s free stuff on that page. But if you scroll, like almost all the way down, there is a worksheet called the chase worksheet. So this morning, I actually used the chase worksheet for several things that I’m working on, because I got clarity, but they were big things. And I need to break it down in a way that helps me get into action. Remember, I don’t want to get stuck, and I don’t want to get overwhelmed. So I have to get into action. Right, I have to be thinking with my stick forward. So if you download the chase worksheet, well, that will put you in the that’ll put you in the thing, where you’ll get the email list where you’ll get my top three things. So
we’re making work, we’re killing lots of birds with one stone.
But that is actually going to give you a worksheet that I created and a video explaining how to use it. But that worksheet is going to help you think of things that you have not thought of yet. Because here’s what happens is we have a big goal, I want 20 people to come into the alchemy Institute. And then we get like chunks of information like big giant chunks of ideas. Well, I could run a big training that explains what it is I could create a workshop I could, like we get, we have ideas. But because those ideas either are too big, we haven’t taken action on them. Or there is a better idea that we haven’t thought of because we have been stuck looking at the big ideas that we have that are too big to actually get into action. So it keeps us out of action. So the chase worksheet is actually going to walk you through a process that’s going to eliminate that problem. So no longer will you have too big of chunks. And you’ll start to notice things that you’ve never noticed before when I did it this morning on that exact thing. I got all kinds of ideas of stuff that I hadn’t thought of before.
All right, the third thing,
this might be your favorite one. If you feel stuck, take a nap. Take a nap because when you take a nap
It allows your unconscious mind to start doing the work on that problem without your conscious mind or that what we call a critical factor to start butting in. Right? Because you go, Oh, I could do that. But I don’t know that would take so much time. I don’t know how I would do it, I’d have to learn I’d need to, how would I get people like use your brain, your conscious mind is going to get all up in your way. Okay, so take a nap. And when you wake up, you might just notice that there’s a lot of clarity.
If you put a piece of paper next to your bed, or next, wherever you’re napping, and write down the number one thing that I said, which is what do you want, write it down, and then just say unconscious mind, figure that out for me, I’m gonna take a nap. You figure it out, just let me know when I wake up. magical, magical. All right, number four. Number four is get back to basics. I believe firmly that we complicate things, and make things a lot harder than they need to be. And if we could just get back to basics, whatever the basics are, for whatever it is that you’re doing, things will become a whole lot easier. There have been times where I’m like, where I’ve left a job. And then I’ve looked back at that job and been like, Why did I make that so hard. It’s so obvious now, what it is I should have done, like, I should have done this and this and this. And almost every time that is like the basic things. But we complicate things. Because things feel harder, confusing. We complicate them and make them a little bit harder for ourselves to figure out because we think this is a lot. I’m confused. And so it must be hard. So break it down. And sometimes I just make a list and say, this thing, the basics of this, are these three things, right? I want 20 people into the alchemy Institute, what are the basic things? Well, I got to just be telling people about it. Like, I gotta be explaining why it’s important. I’ve got an email list, I could tell them in an email, I’ve got the podcast, I could be telling you in a podcast show, I should have a pug maybe, maybe next week, I just have a podcast. So I tell you what it is and why I think this is so important and how this is life changing. That’s such a good idea. Let’s do that next week. And actually, let’s do that. Next we have, okay, I have an idea. Let’s do that next week. And I’m going to explain why it’s important. And you can listen, and we might spur something else to you that’s important. But why it’s important? And then why don’t we pull a group of people together to walk through the material together, and I will guide you through it. And we’ll put it in real life scenarios. Like we’ll, we’ll talk about how to use it in real life so that the material isn’t just like, Oh, I’m getting certified in this thing. Like, maybe it’s that you want it for personal development, right? So back to basics, what is it right, just get into the basics of what it is that you would need to do. So we’ll do that next week. Basics. It’s easy, and it’s fun, and think about what it is that you would need to do with whatever it is that you’re stuck on. That would help you. Alright, number five, is take any action. Did you know that you get more stuck, if you don’t do anything, and I know this is the same idea of always think with your stick forward. But like take any action, like it doesn’t have to be good action. But if you are doing something, you begin to move outside of the area that is keeping its hold on you. So if you’re like I am, I’m having trouble at work, right? I never get listened to I’m struggling with my boss, take any action. Maybe that’s like, I’m going to write an email and just say how I feel or I’m going to,
like do a little bit more on one piece of this project. Or I am going to like, really listen, I’m gonna go to a thing and I’m going to really listen to a meeting and I’m gonna really listen and I’m gonna ask way more questions than I usually do. I’m going to get really, really clear, clear, right? I’m going to help them get like, tell me and get super clear. Going back to number one, what is it you want, right? I’m going to help somebody get super clear, like anything that you can take, right? I’m going to send an email, I’m going to create this podcast for next week, like whatever it is. Okay. And then there’s a sixth one, which is kind of a bonus one. And this one came to me because this was so helpful to me.
This week, because I just did not feel like
I just didn’t feel like myself, you know, but it’s number six is choose your thoughts. And this can be really hard. This can be really hard. I’m not going to sugarcoat that at all, you know, I have been really struggling recently, just life has been hectic and busy and overwhelming. And, and I have noticed a lot of like, just thoughts in my head, like, negative thoughts, you know? And I’ve had to choose, like, do I want to believe that? Yes, I’m having that thought. That’s okay, I am having that thought I acknowledge it. And then I’m like, is that what I want to believe? Because I get to choose. Like, in the end, sometimes it doesn’t feel like we’re getting to choose, but we do we get to choose. And so how can I choose differently? What would I need to do to be thinking differently? What would I need to believe for what I just thought to not be true?
get really clear, what is it that you want? How are you going to know that you have it? Number two, download the chase worksheet, start to think about things that you have never thought of before. And take a nap, get back to basics. And then take any action that’s going to help you keep moving. And just remember, there’s always choice. And when you believe that that empowers you. There’s always choice, there’s choice in your thoughts, there’s choice on if you want to be stuck or not. There have been times my friends, where I have been like, I’m going to be stuck today. I’m going to be stuck tomorrow, maybe I’ll choose something else. But right now this is overwhelming. And this is what I’m choosing. And that’s okay, I take a nap. And then I see if I changed my mind. So I think when you can do all of that, I think you can always think with your stick forward, you can be ready for any challenge. And you can keep yourself moving, and you can keep yourself out of being stuck. And that I think is how you start to live a big life. So thank you so much for listening. I hope that you could hear me okay, and it wasn’t too annoying with my nose. sounding like a little bit like I had paper, not a paper clip, a nose clip, laundry clip, you know, oh, my nose. But anyway, it was good to be with you all and I’m happy. I’m feeling better. And I will see you next week. Let’s do this fun episode next week. I have a lot of thoughts now. So I’ll see you next week we’re going to talk all about NLP and why I think it can change your life. I promise. All right. I’ll see you there.
Hey, thanks so much for listening to today’s show. And thank you for sharing the show with your friends. I love when you guys do that. I appreciate it so much. And thank you for leaving me a review on iTunes. I know that it matters because when I go to find a podcast, I always look to see what the reviews are. So it really means a lot to me that you take a minute to like figure out how to even make that happen. Now, if you want to find me find me on social media, I’m usually on Instagram, starting out on Tik Tok. It’s just my name. Betsy pake, and that’s my website to Betsy pake.com. And you can find out all about the work that I do. having me speak for an event that you might be helping to plan or getting trained inside my alchemy Institute. But to make it really easy, if you want me just shoot me a DM shoot me a direct message on Instagram and I will be at your service. Thanks again for listening. And I will see you all next week.