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Welcome to The Art of Living big podcast. My name is Betsy Pake, and I’m an author, speaker and a master mindset coach focused on helping you understand and design your life with the power of your subconscious. This podcast is designed to help you think differently about what could be possible for your life.
let’s go live big. Hello fellow adventurers. Welcome to today’s show. I am excited today to talk about step two. So if you listened last week, I talked about step one, I’m going to recap that just a little bit. But you’re welcome to pause this and go back to that episode and listen there first, so that it all makes a little bit more sense. But before we get started, I wanted to let you know that I recently recorded an episode for an online retreat.
And it is a reinvention retreat, it’s this woman put together this really incredible event to bring together 10 or 11. You know, coaches thought leaders, people that are authors and, and interviewing them and sharing just some really incredible things to help you move forward in your life. And I just trying to think the best way, here’s how you can get there. So the link is kind of one of those links that might not be super easy for me to give you over the over the podcast.
But anywhere on my social media, Instagram, on my public Facebook page, there is a link that has all of that if you click on it, it’ll give you four or five different things that I’m up to right now. But it’ll be the very first thing that’s listening, let’s list it. And it will say like, click here to register. It’s a free event. And if you are on my my email list, you will get an email about it. But go ahead and click the link get signed up.
Do that today before you forget and get the email every day, she’ll send you an email every day for its thing as 10 or 11 days where she’ll give you the next person’s interview and kind of give you the next thing to come in. And she’s just got a really cool lineup. So I was really honored to be part of it. I would love for you to listen to my episode, and see what you think so Alright, so let’s
get into step two.
So last week, we talked about step one, which is Abraham Hicks, if you’re not familiar with Abraham Hicks, you can go back to episode I think it’s like 7071, I talk about Abraham Hicks. The step one is contrast.
So the whole idea behind step one is that every day, all day long, we’re experiencing contrast, things that we don’t like things that we do like. And our only job in this step is to notice the contrast and shift to what we do want. So I noticed, you know, I noticed that I stubbed my toe, and I don’t like that so I can shift my thoughts to it feels really good to have my other foot feel really healthy, right? I want to feel really healthy.
I use the example in last week’s episode of granola, I bought two different kinds of granola. I tried one of them, and I didn’t like it. And so I just shifted my thought to next time I’m going to use this other granola. Here’s the problem is that so many times when it’s something bigger than stubbing your toe or getting granola, what do you do is you get really, really focused on the thing you don’t want, and you create a lot of momentum behind it, right?
So my boss sent me a jerky email. So instead of shifting and saying this is giving me perspective on what I would do as a boss, or I can see that my boss has some pain that he’s not dealing with. Or I can see that maybe there needs to be some better communication, I could go to him and get some better community or her and get better communication going. You know, so instead of doing that, we go, Oh, my God, what a jerk.
He’s such a jerk. And then you call your best friend and you’re like, listen to this email. And then it creates this abundance of energy behind it. And when that happens, it starts to get bigger and bigger, whatever you’re focused your energy on is what is going to expand. So you’re actually expanding the bad thing. Now I used the example of the granola. Because it’s such a small thing, when it’s something small, we typically don’t spend a whole lot of time putting momentum behind the thing that we don’t want, we just shift to what we do want keep moving along with our lives.
But when it’s something bigger, we tend to get really stuck, right? And so this is really more of an attachment, right? We have this expectation for how people should behave, or what kinds of things should be happening and when we have this attachment We’re really grasping for that thing to change in order for us to feel okay? The whole idea behind step one is that you just shift to what you do want, and get really focused on that and have that become what is building the momentum.
Okay? So now that you’ve shifted, now you’re shifting, you see the contrast, you’re shifting, now you move to step two, of manifesting what it is you want. So step two, according to Abraham, is when you ask, it is always given. So as soon as you have the idea of what it is that you want, then that is starting to expand, because that’s what you’re putting your energy towards. Right? If you do step one properly, and you move towards what it is you want. Now, that starts to expand, that starts to have some energy built around
Now I want to say two different things. One is, there is an energy perspective to this, I’m putting energy into it, energy is growing around it. The second thing is my subconscious. There’s a science part of this, and that is that my subconscious has something called a reticular activating system, an RA s. And the RA S is designed to show you what it thinks is important.
things are important based on where you put your attention. Okay, so that energy. So if you think focusing on the crappy granola is really important, then your brain is going to start showing you other kinds of granola just like that. Other brand other other kinds that are of that same brand, right? So my there’s two parts to it, there’s the energy component to it. And there’s also you training your brain and your subconscious.
So when I get to step two, when you ask is given, how do I even get it then, right, because I have stuff I want, I’ve asked, I’ve shifted, here’s the number one mistake that people make is when they are stuck in step one, and they’re continuing to focus on what it is they don’t want. They don’t see the science from their subconscious to be able to move towards the thing. So getting really good at noticing signs in step two, is incredibly important. I have a girlfriend who is an intuitive, I’m going to have her on the show, at some point, as soon as she will do me the honor of coming on the show.
But it’s fascinating to me, because she, she talks to she’s not a psychic or anything like that she talks to spirit. And so she’ll talk to my spirit guides. So her spirit guides talk to my spirit guides. And that’s how she gets the information. And so I talked with her for a long time the other day. And she said there’s no coincidences, there’s none. Everything is a sign. So if you see something, it is a sign.
And it was interesting because I bought two books the other day. And if you’ve listened to this show for some time, then you’ve heard me talk about my mom or my grandmother. And so if you haven’t listened to the show, then you’ll hear it as you go through. But the point is that they’re my mom’s name was Carol, and my grandmother’s name was merge, Margie. And I bought two books the other day right after talking with my girlfriend.
And she said, there’s no coincidences, Betsy. And so I bought the two books. And you know, when you buy a book, and then you open it up to any paragraph just to kind of see like what it says. And it talks about somebody named March, Margie. And there was a big March and a march mark, big Margie and Margie in this in that one paragraph. So Mark to Marty’s in one paragraph. So I was like, Oh, that’s really cool. That’s a sign.
And then I opened up the other book, and I opened it right up to a paragraph about Carol. So there’s no coincidences, but we’ve got to be looking for these signs. And if you’re really hell bent on focusing on the thing you don’t want and how mad you are at your boss or your husband or your ex or whatever it is, then you won’t see the signs for the things. So step one is crucial that you start to shift. And I’m going to come in to the Facebook group.
If you’re not in there, just jumping there, you can go to the art of living big.com. It’ll bring you right into the Facebook group. I’m going to come in this week, I’m going to be traveling to LA or I’ll be in LA when you listen to this. But I’m going to try and come in and talk a little bit about step one and more of how to shift because this is so vitally important. And I think in the whole like scheme of things and when we look at the abraham hicks stuff, we sort of we go Oh yeah, focus on what you want.
Like it’s it. This is the upmost importance, because we, most people get stuck in step one, they never can get out of step one. And so if you can shift, and then you get into step two, then it is knowing it’s coming. So how do you get there? Because we live on a physical plane, and we’ve got to take action. You get there by noticing these signs, noticing the synchronicities, being aware, right? So I looked at those two books.
I know exactly that those were the right books for me, right? Because I saw some signs. Now. I know it. Yeah, I know, you might be going well come on, Betsy. Like that’s, that’s pretty normal name, they get it totally. Absolutely. And I know when I follow the signs, then I get where I want to go much faster, quicker. And I know that those are not normal enough names for me to open up on one paragraph and see them. And so I was like, This is what I’m supposed to read. I just knew that as I pulled things off my, my bookshelf, and, you know, chose my next books. And so becoming aware and knowing that it’s done, whatever it is that you’ve shifted to in step one, that thing that you said you wanted is already done.
So okay, just to recap,
I’m in step one, something happens, I choose what it is, I do want, that sends out a signal to the universe, and to my subconscious, that this is what I want, wherever my attention goes is where the energy flows. And so now I’m building up steam around the thing that I want, I’m building up momentum behind it. Now all I have to do is look for the signs. So how do I do that? Now Abraham talks about taking inspired action.
That’s what I did. When I saw those. The names Carol and Margie, and those books, I took inspired action, I pulled them both. And I said, these are the ones that I’m going to read next. And then I just picked which one I wanted to read, which felt better to me, which seemed easier to bring on an airplane since I’ll be traveling. So. So being noticing this and also taking that inspired action, this, I’ll tell you how this is different than not taking inspired action, I have a I buy books like if somebody recommends a book or I see a book, a lot of times they’ll just buy it on Amazon, it’s it’s possibly one of my faults, because I end up having a lot of books on my shelf that I have not read.
So I make like a stack with the ones I want to read on the top. And I usually can get through, I mean a couple of books a month, I would like it to be more but a couple books a month at least. And so I have this stack. And then I tune to to not take inspired action to do the opposite of step two, would be to make a list to stack the books up to just pick randomize it to say I’ve got to read this one.
First, I have to have a structure around this and and make you know, I’ve got to get through for this month. These are the ones that are on top of the stack. So I’m just going to do it like that is causes stress, this is the kinds of things that like can cause stress and keep you out of being in alignment that can keep you out of noticing these signs, right? So you’re putting like all this structure and stuff.
But aligned action is looking at those stack and saying what is my intuition say, maybe I pick one up and I look at it right, and then I see the name, or I, I start to notice what what when I’m drawn to Am I thinking about one when I wake up in the morning, right? And then that’s the one that I pull and go for. So this is inspired action. And now that’s just me choosing a book, but you can do this for anything, you can start to take inspired action. The next part about taking inspired action is when you want to work on something that you want, right, you’re like, I’m going to take action on this thing.
Don’t do that action when you’re in a negative emotion. So take that action from a place that you want to continue to feel in. Because if you take action, when you’re in a down mood or in a negative emotion, then it’s going to be counter-protest productive. It’s not going to work in the way that you want. So get yourself in a better state. And that can happen really quickly. If you’re going to work on something and you’re not in a great mood like like me, I’m busy today. Today’s a busy day I’m packing to go to LA I got a lot of things going on. And I wanted to get these shows recorded so that I could have them for you but I I felt like I gotta get that show recorded, right?
I got to do it. So I could do something on my list. And I was like, hold up, like, it’s an honor that I get to do this. And I’m not just saying that it really is. And if my energy that’s coming to it is that I have to do it, like, that’s gonna be a really crappy show. And so I turned on some music, I have been building a new, a new list of music that gets me pumped up, I’m going to share it in the Facebook group.
And I think I’m going to because I kind of do a new list every month. So I thought it might be fun to start to share those. I’ll share them on social media or in the Facebook group. But I got my music on, and then I felt really good. And then I felt like super excited about connecting with everybody. And sharing this, it’s probably stuff you already know. But maybe there’ll be something in it that I say that like, connects in a different way. And you go, oh, and then how cool is that? Right? So I started to generate this better energy, so you can shift your state so quickly.
Sometimes we think, well, I’m in a bad mood. And so I’m just gonna stay in a bad mood. And it’s because you’re focused on your back in step one, and you’re focused on what you don’t want.
So shift out of that can happen just like that. I mean, it happened for me, and like a two minute song, right, and I just danced around my office. And then I was like, Ooh, this is good, I’m going to jump on and record this show. So don’t take the action when you’re in a negative emotion, because it’s going to be counterproductive. So take it from a place that you feel expanded and happy and excited.
Now, Abraham Hicks says it takes 68 seconds to start creating momentum around what you want. So if you’re in contrast, and you’ve put a lot of momentum behind what you don’t want, more than 68 seconds, hasn’t been days, hours weeks, then you’ve got a ton of momentum, and that’s okay. All you have to do is start to shift that and move that so that once you start 68 seconds towards what you do want things are already shifting, things are already happening for you. And you’re making a change just after that little amount of time. So I want you to focus on what you want, get in there and then start to look for those signs.
Anytime you’re going to take action, make sure you’re in a place of feeling the emotions that you really want to feel in this new place. And I want you to start noticing coincidences, noticing how you feel about things, you know, when we go to make a choice. So many times we go to like rational thought, or we go to like this makes the most sense. Or we ask a friend, what do you think I want you to pause and just ask yourself, if I just had to pick from my gut feeling?
What would I pick? And just try this out. Just try it out and see if things start to flow for you in a much easier way. I believe that we have been programmed as children, I know I have been that we have to work really hard for what we want. We have to work really hard and anything worth having is worth working hard for.
And I am working to reject that I have that programming as well. And I’m working to reject that. Because what if anything worth having is following the science. What if anything worth having is listening to your gut and slowing down? What if anything worth having is creating a lot of fun around it. That’s what makes it worth having. Because if you create something with a lot of work, then it’s going to continue to be a lot of work.
And if you create it who had a lot of fun, it’s going to continue to be a lot of fun. Now this I talked earlier about, or I talked on, on Monday’s episode about stress about how I’ve been stressed. This is something I’m focused on, because I very much have been brought up in the work really hard. And that can be really exhausting, right? I know you’ve been there. I know you’re with me. So what if just give yourself a week, tell your brain just for a week, I’m only going to do what feels right.
I’m going to go off my intuition. I’m going to listen to my gut. I’m going to focus on what I want in step one. And when I get to step two, then I’m going to just watch the signs and listen to my gut and feel into everything that I want. I’m curious if you’ll start to find the people that you want to find that can help you if things will start to rearrange themselves so that everything becomes easier if you’ll start to see ways that you can bring more fun into it and things become aligned and things start to move in a much easier way. I’m doing this experiment myself. I want things to be easy.
Why would I want to work really hard? Like why would I want to work really hard? And even as I say that I feel the programming going well, it’s you want to be a hard worker, Betsy. Yeah, I want to put, I want to put emphasis on things. I want to put my energy into things. But I want that to be easy. I don’t want that to be hard. Yeah, I want to take action. I want to take a lot of action. And I want all of that action to feel really good, super lined and be terribly productive. Like, I want it to be insanely productive. Why would I want to trudge through, like I was had my feet in quicksand, trying to move through something, because that’s hard.
And that’s what we value. But what if I could take tons of action, but it could be really fun, really aligned, and I could start to shift the way I’m seeing things. Then I start to notice synchronicities. things start happening for me much easier, I become happier. And in that happiness, what I really want, begins to grow. Let’s try that because that, I think is how you live a big life. Thanks so much for listening. I will see you all on Monday. And until then, keep following the signs and listening to your gut.
See you soon.
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